captknutz

Fortune Cookies: a drunken rant

This really has nothing to do with anything but: Don't you hate when you think of exactly the perfect thing to say after the fact? I do, it happens at least once a day. Does that make me slow witted, or does thi happen to everyone else too?
I love fortune cookies!!! It's one of the many many many things I love about getting Chinese food. I once bought a box of fortune cookies at the grocery store and ate the entire damn thing just for the hell of it. Today my fortunes are: "this is a wonderful time to look inward for answers", "you can fix it whit a little extra energy and a positive attitude", and a great man never ignores the simplicity of a child" Indeed words of wisdom. That's the thing I love about fortune cookies, you get a delicious after dinner snack as well as sagely, Dr. Phil(who is satan, ask me and I'll tell you how I figured that one out) like widom.

Today I decided to rearrange my furniture in sandals for some reason, and ended up really fucking my big toe up by dropping a coffee table on it, and then later I texted this girl I used to see and don't ask me why on that one. So basically it was a day of bad decisions.