cappy

i suppose at some point i need to update a little . im orking nights again driving a tractor for custom farming and once again i have no life . i have a love interest but she is not very independent - its okay to a point but i think im getting tired of it . i really like another girl who is more in my league of "getting shit done" and somewhat having an idea of what she wants from life - but she is a real free spirit - one i know would be hard to get to settle down .


i know im not king shit but the girl im with now is like 23 and doesnt even have a license or a will to drive (a must in this area) so i have to do all the traveling and usually i dont mind so much but all i have to drive right now is the motorcycle - and thats if im lucky enough for it to be above 45, less than 20 mph wind, and not raining .

ive been with her for almost a year now and truthfully she has a brain but no motivation to get up and do anything . she is very pretty as well and i luv the sex and since my first whole year up here i never got any (not cause i didnt try either) that might be hard to give up .

should i dump her and break her heart ? stay with her and have a dependant for the rest of my life ? start binge drinking to drown my mind ?

normally im not so mixed up ...