Could things seriously get any more complicated?
Jake called me tonight.
And I went to get him.
We were just going to hang out like friends. That's it.
But one thing led to another and we're holding hands and he kisses me and....
we're both standing there saying we just don't know how to stay away from each other.
He poured his heart out to me tonight.
Told me exactly how he felt.
And it was just.... shocking.
I was brushing it all off at first, before I even kissed him. We were just talking about what happened between us and all that.
And I was joking around saying how I've decided I am going to marry a guy with a British accent and Jakes says, "That would be awful."
And of course I asked why.
He said
"Because I don't have one."
And I knew it was all down hill from there.
There is and was no doubt in my mind that this boy still loves me. That he can't let go of me.
Obviously I can't let go either because there I was sitting on that park bench with him.
I've always said that I've wanted someone who felt like I was the one that got away, that cared about me as much as I cared about them...
and I have it.
And it's crushing me because I'm so scared.
I told him that, too.
I told him how scared I was of wasting all my time all over again and getting hurt.
And he said, "I know."
He said he was scared too.
That he was going to lose me completely.
That he never wanted to lose me for good.
That he was so scared I'd meet someone else and move on.
I told him I just didn't know how I felt.
And I really, really, don't.
This boy has a hold on my heart, that's for sure.
But like I said
I'm terrified of getting hurt.
He said he wasn't going anywhere this time.
He pleaded for me to be patient with him.
Give him a chance.
See how things go.
And all I could say was
okay
but
I'm still so scared.
Jake called me tonight.
And I went to get him.
We were just going to hang out like friends. That's it.
But one thing led to another and we're holding hands and he kisses me and....
we're both standing there saying we just don't know how to stay away from each other.
He poured his heart out to me tonight.
Told me exactly how he felt.
And it was just.... shocking.
I was brushing it all off at first, before I even kissed him. We were just talking about what happened between us and all that.
And I was joking around saying how I've decided I am going to marry a guy with a British accent and Jakes says, "That would be awful."
And of course I asked why.
He said
"Because I don't have one."
And I knew it was all down hill from there.
There is and was no doubt in my mind that this boy still loves me. That he can't let go of me.
Obviously I can't let go either because there I was sitting on that park bench with him.
I've always said that I've wanted someone who felt like I was the one that got away, that cared about me as much as I cared about them...
and I have it.
And it's crushing me because I'm so scared.
I told him that, too.
I told him how scared I was of wasting all my time all over again and getting hurt.
And he said, "I know."
He said he was scared too.
That he was going to lose me completely.
That he never wanted to lose me for good.
That he was so scared I'd meet someone else and move on.
I told him I just didn't know how I felt.
And I really, really, don't.
This boy has a hold on my heart, that's for sure.
But like I said
I'm terrified of getting hurt.
He said he wasn't going anywhere this time.
He pleaded for me to be patient with him.
Give him a chance.
See how things go.
And all I could say was
okay
but
I'm still so scared.
nikonphoto80:
You have got to do what in the end will make you happy, you have to look ahead and see what your goals are and see what is the most important things to you, you have to look at him and look 20 years down the road, 30 years, 50 years, and even 100 years and see if you think you could be with that man for that many years, can you see yourself at 70 years old looking at that guy and thinking man he is my life and my soul. If you can see yourself with him like that then I guess it is meant to be, but to many people don't look into the years ahead and end up with some one who 10 years form now just doesn't do it for them any more. good luck, I'm sure it will all work out in the end.