calvers

Okay SG'rs, this is going to be a tough journal entry. If you look up ;neglected' in the dictionary it would refer you back to this journal, but I do have good reason, mainly becasue I've typed and deleted this page about ten times in the last two weeks.

Basically flash back to the 7th of Jan. My other half and I have always been embarrasingly close; holding hands, kissing in public, etc. We have alwasy been the 'dream couple' amongst our friends for the last seven....count 'em, seven years. After a good christmas and new year she was definately not happy going back to work; a bit snappy and obvioulsy not happy, so I tried to make as much effort to get her back into the swing of things. On the 7th I made her her favourite meal, had a roaring fire going when she got home and had secretly booked a weekend away at her favourite hotel to cheer her up. Before telling her my plans I gave her a big hug and asked what was wrong. She told me that she was moving out the next day and that she had been planning it for months. 15 hours later she was gone. No arguements, no discussion, just seven yeasr down the toilet with no warning.

Hence why I changed my profile to 'single and looking' shortly afterwards.

Since then I have been mercifully extremely busy with the studio booked out pretty much solidly since. If it hadn't I'd probably have stuck my head in a gas oven. Ironically I have had long slow break ups from girls who I'd know for months and not seven years that had cuased black armband wearing and vows of celibacy for months, however, the shear suddeness of the split and me having spent the most agonising three days of my life only crawling out of a bottle to call the fucking samaritans actually seems to have had a cathartic and very rapid effect. Almost like a light switch going on I suddenly woke up and realised I had a fantastic job that sounds good at dinner parties, a cool house (now a very effective batchelor pad) and a couple of flash cars, I didn't need to run interior design decisions through a sub commitee and I no longer needed to worry about waking the other half up when I crawled to bed at 3am. Suddenly I was okay.

Since then I have been on the receiving end of more booty calls and offers of charitable shags than I know what to do with, which is nice. Plus I did meet the adorable Bekiii (she's on the site check her out she's hilarious and way too smart for my liking!) who seems to have turned my house into an impromptu aerobics studio.

I'm actually okay - not in denial, not drowning my sorrows, maybe thingsd like this are meant to be. When I was with Het I though I was happy, but maybe she did me a favour and now I know that things weren't as perfect as I thought.

Friends have been very kind, especially those on SG like Joebot and the infamous Mr Lithium Picnic who only knwo me through text and pictures, that means a lot - thanks guys.

So, anyway - I'm back. Sorry for neglecting my page, Bekiii's insistance that I join Myspae has something to do with that (I'm listed under Calvers as per here, so feel free to add me) but basically I'm fine, I'm up to my eyes in work (for work read money!) so I shall resume normal service with a weekly update.

Be nice children, I'm still a bit fragile!