cakemix

so my last post...was friday the 13th...and as well as my rant about my current situation, i'd also just found out that my ex-husband had passed away, but i couldn't post anything until i'd talked to ravenisis and other people that were close to us. his funeral was last week, but i only had a couple days notice so didn't go along as i was feeling too stressed out about the whole trying to get to newquay and back in a day...but after talking to his sister this evening i kinda realise that i also just wanted my memories to be of him as he was, although i did hear that he still looked lovely and very very peaceful at his funeral.

the call with his siser was lovely, i just wish i could be there more for her right now... but with the fiance stuff going on i'm just not strong enough for myself much less anyone else. i wish things would get better but they aren't and i really don't know how much more i can take...and ironically i've been approved for the SG wedding planner group on here...but left straight away. will rejoin when the plans are happening again - if they happen again.

but until then i'm having lots and lots of long weekends running away...me and ravenisis are off to paris this friday - phew!