cainroth

I have come to the conclusion that I am a dangerous person. Im looking to fall in love. Im ready to fall in love. But I have no idea what it feels like. There is nothing more dangerous than someone who can fall in love at the drop of a hat.

Sure there are people that I care about out there, family, friends and stuff. But I dont really know what its like to be in love. The real thing.

I think a lied to my Ex a whole lot without knowing it. I wonder if I was ever in love with her. Im fairly certain that I have never felt real love. At the time it was the closest thing I had ever felt that I could call love, but now I think it was mostly lust.

They say you always fall in love with your first I think its just cause we never really know how to love until we try and fail.

I think that I may be having something that feels like real love. There is this little spark of a quite peaceful emotion when I think about a certain friend of mine. Its not like a need. Lately Ive been craving physical attention, but when Im with her it goes away. Not because we did anything sexual, but just because shes there, and shes cool. Its like a cool little appreciation. I wonder if this feeling is going to grow.

All these years have I been barking up the wrong tree? Ive certainly never felt this way about anyone before. Im not sure what it is.