Ive been bad. I havent looked at a new photo set in ages. Most likely not sense Edea. No more swords I was disappointed, well only kinda. Ok not really. Im shirking my SG responsibilities.
Anyway Im really tired. I got up at 6:00 for my first morning shift. Let me tell you combat boots are not good on concrete floors. I had to get some new shoes today. I keep spelling it showes.
I got seven hours of sleep before the party, seven hours of half sleep last night (that weird kind of sleep where your mostly awake, and either dreaming or thinking consistently), and Im about ready to crash. I like 8 hours a night or Im not happy.
Im pretty down and lonely tonight. I spent some time with my excessively cute couple friends. And yeah I enjoyed hanging with them, but the ride home was a bit lonely. Im a just really terrible at meeting fun and interesting people that I want to get to know. And this whole dating thing really mystifies me. Sometimes I wish it would just go away as an issue, and I could just forget that I want to find someone But that doesnt ever work. So Im stuck in this kind of perpetual state of sucking at getting what I want.
Being able to tell the difference between someone that I should just be friends with and someone that I love is what Im working on right now. I have two friends Erin and Abbey, and they are helping me with that. But I cant really claim to be looking for just friends right now, and so every time I meet someone my motivations for getting to know them are suspect. Sometimes it just seems like there is no one out there thats worth doing anything with. Everyone that I have met lately has been not single, or not someone that I feel anything for. Then again my first (so far last, and only) girl who I really fell in love with was not someone that I instantly feel for either
Im still learning about this relationship stuff. And its very annoying that I dont have anyone to practice on. Very inconvenient. Oh yeah, Im analytical, did I mention that. And sleep. This is a bad combination. Besides its not like Im going to get any advice or anything here. Whatever. More ranting for me! Yay!
Anyway Im really tired. I got up at 6:00 for my first morning shift. Let me tell you combat boots are not good on concrete floors. I had to get some new shoes today. I keep spelling it showes.
I got seven hours of sleep before the party, seven hours of half sleep last night (that weird kind of sleep where your mostly awake, and either dreaming or thinking consistently), and Im about ready to crash. I like 8 hours a night or Im not happy.
Im pretty down and lonely tonight. I spent some time with my excessively cute couple friends. And yeah I enjoyed hanging with them, but the ride home was a bit lonely. Im a just really terrible at meeting fun and interesting people that I want to get to know. And this whole dating thing really mystifies me. Sometimes I wish it would just go away as an issue, and I could just forget that I want to find someone But that doesnt ever work. So Im stuck in this kind of perpetual state of sucking at getting what I want.
Being able to tell the difference between someone that I should just be friends with and someone that I love is what Im working on right now. I have two friends Erin and Abbey, and they are helping me with that. But I cant really claim to be looking for just friends right now, and so every time I meet someone my motivations for getting to know them are suspect. Sometimes it just seems like there is no one out there thats worth doing anything with. Everyone that I have met lately has been not single, or not someone that I feel anything for. Then again my first (so far last, and only) girl who I really fell in love with was not someone that I instantly feel for either
Im still learning about this relationship stuff. And its very annoying that I dont have anyone to practice on. Very inconvenient. Oh yeah, Im analytical, did I mention that. And sleep. This is a bad combination. Besides its not like Im going to get any advice or anything here. Whatever. More ranting for me! Yay!