cadyne

"I think bipolar disorder is more than just a bad mood."

Yeah, no shit, Natalie. Thanks for your input.

"I've seen bipolar up close, it's really bad."

Ok, Andrew, I'm sure you've seen it up close, and the fact that my mother is bipolar means nothing, because of course, I don't know what I'm talking about.

But it's fine. I'm ok. I don't need other people to understand.

I've discussed the possibility of me having BD with my mother and she thinks it is highly likely. So did my former psychologist. And the Navy shrink.

And yet nothing is being done and I'm not receiving any help with this because my "bad mood" doesn't count in this office.

Only I'm not in a bad mood right now, I'm in a good mood - internally, at least. I just don't feel like being around people. I feel like sleeping. Thus I will skip the Safety Fair and the Armed Forces Week Ball tonight, even though I have been looking forward to them for weeks, because I can't face that many people right now. And I can't get all dressed up and drive back to base after work and try to socialize even though I'm not up to it - I can't and I won't.

And when I am in these moods, they last for longer than a few hours. I'll feel like this for days, and then wake up one morning and the world is great and I have all this energy.. and then it will disappear just as quickly and I'll be trying to hold the wheel straight and ignore the voice in my head telling me to drive my car off the bridge..

but yeah, it's probably just a bad mood.