cabaretic

Steps for Buying A Hooker.

1. Look in the Yellow Pages.

2. Find the "E" section, then find "Escort".

3. "Escort", contrary to what you might think, doesn't mean someone who shuttles you safely from one destination to another. In actuality, "Escort" is one of those euphemisms we use to mean a person of the night, or, to put it bluntly, a prostitute.

4....
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I attended the Bipolar Support Group last night, expecting answers, and instead found a group of jovial eccentrics mostly wanting to be understood.

The mincing gay man, with protruding stomach fat that I tried to ignore, but found my eyes drawn to over and over again. I don't know what it is about me, but if some has a particularly unusual physical flaw, like a...
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I've just about
had it with you

You don't know
what you've
put me through

The sun's gone down
but it's okay
to breathe

I believe
in the truth
of the moon.

I used to watch
a lot of cartoons

But now I hit the bottle
waiting for noon

The liquor's gone
and I've got more than
a buzz
just because
I'm a drunken buffoon....
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I just saw life as colored bad. Can't seem to get a job. My previous mental storms prevented me from working very long at any one place, and I can't put these places down as work experiences because I only lasted a few months...and then was summarily let go because I was too sick to show up to work.

I can't seem to get anything...
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I tried to hang myself this morning.

I feel suicidal, but I'm trying to change it. Life seems hopeless and pointless beyond belief.

Why can't I hold it together long enough to get a job, or better yet, get into the Peace Corps and make a difference in the lives of someone besides my own.

I have an enormous amount of self-loathing and low self-esteem induced narcissism...I want to feel superior to...
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If Death was like warnings on prescription drug bottles

Although, so far there's no known treatment for death's crippling effects, still everyone can acquaint himself with the three early warning signs of death:

1. rigor mortis
2. a rotting smell
3. occasional drowsiness

If you die, do not panic, instead follow these instructions:

1. Do not operate heavy machinery.
2. Do not operate a motor...
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These were my friends.

They were the sort of girls that parents referred to as trouble, with barely concealed distain and clenched teeth. Had one bothered take a glance at their early childhood progress reports, one would have found many mentions of disrupting behavior in class and tendencies to talk out of turn.

Most often than not they came from broken homes, where...
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Trifecta

ROB

Friday night, 15 January

They had to coat Melindas head with Vaseline. They slid her through the narrow doorway to her office. This was all that Serge (as we are supposed to call him not Sergei) could think to use to lubricate the doorway.

When found later, by itself, with the top off, next to a drunken Melinda, it fueled the gossip that...
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I

I charmed her with my breakdown stories. As if these are things to be proud ofas if, as if, as if. She was certainly impressed. Impressed that I had in fact, drank kerosene and survived it. Tell me more, she said.

So I told her everything. Told her about every bad meal. Every fight in the day room. Every shock treatment. Every person I...
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