i think people need to better undertand the concept of a "favor"
i joined circus as a 'favor" to you, cause you wanted to persue your passion, and you put a lot of money into me teaching for you.
from the begining i made it very clear that this was a FAVOR for you, and since i have 4 jobs, meeting with you once a week for two hours was all i could do.
i made it VERY clear, that circus is not my passion, and it was feeling like a chore, and perhaps you should find another partner who actually gets excited about doing it.
you want me to perform after only 4 weeks of practicing, and i refuse saying im not ready.
i am not going to make a fool of myself becuase you have comited me to perform without asking.
YOU are getting payed $3000 dollars, not me. you say this money is going towards our dream of the circus, when i have repeated to you that this is not my dream, this is a favor and its a chore to me.
you get mad at me because i refuse to perform with such little practice.
you reply with "well you could have been ready if you had worked harder".
and you wonder why i want to punch you in the face??
i keep making it blatent that i do not like training, i am sick to be up high, and i have to fight with myself to actually show up to practice.
i dont want to dress up like a clown.
i dont want to act like a clown
i do not want to "entertain" kids.
even if i wanted to, i cant go up to strangers and make them laugh.
i hate that fact that i have comited myself to an event that has changed from the moment i said yes, to the time i have to perform.
it began with "there is an even that we have been asked to perform at, you dont have to perform but i still need some people to help out"
so at that point it was me doing make-up, directing the show, organizing our staff,
then somehow it turned to me performing a routine that i have NEVER done.
and now its me dressed up like a rodeo clown walking around the crowd entertaining people.
i cant do it.
but backing out is not an option. (wanna make a bet???)
you ask me to help you run the camps in the summer, promising a career wage.
you tell me today that camps start tommorow and get mad at me because i have prior commitments.
my wage has been reduced to half of what we had origionaly agreed to, and you get mad at me for refusing?
what would you do if i never answered my phone?
cause that is what i feel like doing.
i joined circus as a 'favor" to you, cause you wanted to persue your passion, and you put a lot of money into me teaching for you.
from the begining i made it very clear that this was a FAVOR for you, and since i have 4 jobs, meeting with you once a week for two hours was all i could do.
i made it VERY clear, that circus is not my passion, and it was feeling like a chore, and perhaps you should find another partner who actually gets excited about doing it.
you want me to perform after only 4 weeks of practicing, and i refuse saying im not ready.
i am not going to make a fool of myself becuase you have comited me to perform without asking.
YOU are getting payed $3000 dollars, not me. you say this money is going towards our dream of the circus, when i have repeated to you that this is not my dream, this is a favor and its a chore to me.
you get mad at me because i refuse to perform with such little practice.
you reply with "well you could have been ready if you had worked harder".
and you wonder why i want to punch you in the face??
i keep making it blatent that i do not like training, i am sick to be up high, and i have to fight with myself to actually show up to practice.
i dont want to dress up like a clown.
i dont want to act like a clown
i do not want to "entertain" kids.
even if i wanted to, i cant go up to strangers and make them laugh.
i hate that fact that i have comited myself to an event that has changed from the moment i said yes, to the time i have to perform.
it began with "there is an even that we have been asked to perform at, you dont have to perform but i still need some people to help out"
so at that point it was me doing make-up, directing the show, organizing our staff,
then somehow it turned to me performing a routine that i have NEVER done.
and now its me dressed up like a rodeo clown walking around the crowd entertaining people.
i cant do it.
but backing out is not an option. (wanna make a bet???)
you ask me to help you run the camps in the summer, promising a career wage.
you tell me today that camps start tommorow and get mad at me because i have prior commitments.
my wage has been reduced to half of what we had origionaly agreed to, and you get mad at me for refusing?
what would you do if i never answered my phone?
cause that is what i feel like doing.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
I got to wear mine out last night for the first time to Phantom and so many people stopped to compliment them then call me Dorthy, very creative.....