@missy @rambo
Here is my blog homework for this week!
What advice would you give your teenage self?
If I could go back in time, I would tell my teenage self that my confidence about how I looked would grow. I had, and still do, have some self esteem issues. It's petty stuff really when you think about it, but I would have crushes on a few guys, but when I mentioned I had a crush on them, there was never a mutual feeling back. I did have a boyfriend in high school, but we broke up. Junior prom, I went with one of my female friends...because we both didn't have dates. Senior prom, I went with a male friend of mine, whom had always liked me, but I thought of him as a friend (I saw my ex at the prom too...with a female friend that brought him and her boyfriend as her date).
I never felt pretty in high school and to this day still have insecurities about how I look. Being on Suicidegirls, my confidence has grown. I still have my moments of course, but my teenage self would be shocked at how much more confidence I have in myself (it took me until I was in my late 20s to finally come with my itty bitty titties).
I would also tell my teenage self to enjoy things a little bit more and try out a few things and experiences before it becomes too late or harder to do. I look back and wish I would have traveled some more or tried some new things. I'm not one to say some things still can't be done, they can...it just would have been nice to do them when I was younger!
I grew up fast after my mom passed away when I was young. I guess I would just want to tell myself to be young and dumb (to a point hahaha). I would want my teenage self to know that I will still be loved and that people will think I am beautiful, they just may not say it directly to me.
I know one thing for sure is that my teenage self would not have thought of me enjoying dancing on a pole! Or getting nude photographs taken! I would have been so shy and modest! I have Suicidegirls to thank for the push to submit a set and encouragement from a few dear friends. In a little over 1 month, my first set will be in Member Review....and I can't wait to see if it gets love and how much it gets...it is in essence, a thank you to my dear friends and Suicidegirls for giving me the confidence to even apply to be a model. And I was so happy to get where I am now...a Hopeful! I didn't even think I would get that far and my teenage self would have thought the same!
