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burtlo

Member Since 2004

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Monday Apr 21, 2008

Apr 21, 2008
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I am often lulled asleep by the immensity of the details which weigh heavy on my life. It is in this ebb that I am nearly unreachable in an intellectual sense.

A particular document was suggested to me that I had wholly ignored for a number of months. The gravity of the material, as it was described to me, did not seem relevant at that particular moment. The recent change in my life has given rise to a flow, allowing me the energies to reflect.

Individualists often replace the focus on causality (past) and goals (future) of the Conscientious person with a fascination with the immediate present. They need to understand and watch how things unfold. Their focus turns from outcomes and deliverables to an interest in the processes, relationships and non-linear influences among variables. Individualists watch how they themselves and other people change and behave differently in different contexts.



When I was younger I remember constantly being filled with regret when I did not act in accord with what I had hoped to accomplish. The moment of the now was the culmination of much forethought, the realization of a long laid plan. I would reflect on my actions in cases where I was both fortunate and unfortunate, with wistful longing.

Now, I identify with the individualist. I only recently found myself describing, in similar terms, how I am able to maintain a positive outlook and minimize emotional discomfort. I will still peer into the past to find the perspective and emotion density to convey a compelling story with sincerity and intensity. But I am rarely, if ever regretful of my actions when I have been deliberate. I have recently started to minimize long, looks into the future even in the situations when an activity requiring a level of commitment of attendance, time, and energy (i.e. classes, work, responsibilities, and relationships) is involved.

The latter change has been much more recent in my life. I have become accomplishing laid out plans by minimizing extraneous forethought related to these actions. I would previously arrange an event and then cancel because there was some low level anxiety associated with the task coupled with the enjoyment in the newly manufactured free-time, mental accounting, from the cancellation. This even bled into my ability to answer the phone - as I would often defer conversations out of some unknown dread.

This was an important change and an area in which I most definitely needed growth and most likely still need growth.

How do you handle the past, the present, and the future?

VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
jonnyjonnyh:
For me, handling the future is the hardest part. .That being said, I tend to find that taking care of the present at least makes dealing the future a tad bit easier.

The past is a whole new ball of wax. You have to deal with it and not ignore it. Writing, meditation, whatever. It just needs to be handled. You obviously do a lot of your processing through writing. And it's an excellent avenue for contemplative thought.

Apr 22, 2008
mrdeity:
Thanks for the advice and info on the consoles.
Apr 23, 2008

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