bukkakegod

i cant really think of anything good to update in here since last night at work was boring. not a damn thing exciting happened. so ill just leave you some things to ponder on.

Did ya ever wonder
.......If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
.......When you open a new bag of cotton balls, is the top one meant to be thrown away?
.......When your pet bird sees you reading the newspaper, does he wonder why you're just sitting there, staring at carpeting?
.......If a mute swears, does his mother make him wash his hands with soap?
.......If white wine goes with fish, do white grapes go with sushi?
.......Why are there Interstate Highways in Hawaii?
.......Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?
.......Why are there Braille Dots on the keypad of the drive-thru ATM?
.......Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address you turn down the volume on the radio?
.......If you're a Kleptomaniac, is there something you can take for it?
.......In prison you spend the majority of your time in an 8'x10' cell. At work you spend most of your time in a 6'x8'cubicle.
.......In prison you can watch TV and play games. At work you get fired for watching TV and playing games.
.......In prison you spend most of your life looking through the bars from the inside wanting to get out. At work you spend your time wanting to get out and inside bars.
.......Is reading in the bathroom considered Multi-Tasking?
.......Why do you press harder on a remote-control when you know the battery is dead?
.......If Superman could stop bullets with his chest, why did he always duck when someone threw a gun at him?
.......If you're cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?
.......Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person who drives a racecar is not called a racist?