For the "holiday" created by Hershey's and Hallmark
It is that time of year again, my friends. It is the time of year where I turn from your generally lovable cranky old man into an outright Scrooge. You see, I am a very proud Scrooge of Valentines Day. A mere mention of the holiday causes a cold look to cross my face, my jaw to set and then I explode into a long, rambling rant where spit flies from my lips and I start foaming at the mouth and chewing on various pieces of furniture. Oh, my friends, my dear readers, do I hate and loathe and despise this holiday so much it makes my blood boil enough to cook a bag of Jolly Green Giant corn.
The origins of the holiday seem to be in debate. No one really knows where it came from but it probably has something to do with paganism, despite the fact a saints name has been attached to it. The early Christian church did a lot of co-opting of pagan rituals and themes to try and attract more people. You sort of have to picture the early Christians handing out flyers trying to get people to join with the words NOW WITH MORE PAGANISM in bold letters on there somewhere.
The entire holiday is entirely a commercial venture whatever its origins. This is true of most holidays, of course, but at least Christmas and Easter and Thanksgiving also has a component of getting together with family. There is a warmth to those holidays. Valentines Day is just about buying cards, finding the right restaurant for dinner and ads for jewelry. A holiday with murky origins quickly loses its true meaning along the way.
What I hate is the importance so many, particularly you women, put on the damn holiday. It is a date on the calendar. Why does this one day, chosen by society or, even worse, the advertisers, have so much meaning? Oh, most women these days tell me they dont put that much importance on the day. Most of these women are in relationships and, dollars to donuts, if you were to find them without a bouquet of flowers or a card or a dinner or presents of some kind they would be royally ticked off.
Once again, I will tell you a better way to have a random day to celebrate with your loved one. Throw the months of the year into one hat and the numbers 1 31 in another. Then you and your loved one take turns picking from each hat. If you get a date that does not exist (say, February 31) then toss that number and pick again until you get one that make sense. If that is too much work, then focus on your anniversary, because at least that date should have some meaning for you. Valentines Day has no meaning unless you work for a card or candy company or perhaps own a restaurant.
For the rest of us out there, those of us who do not have a Valentine, the entire day is like having needles jammed under your fingernails for 24 hours. It is a constant reminder that you are alone. Yes, you may hate the day and the concept, but you still wish you had someone else with you to rant and rave against it with as much vehemence as yourself.
All in all, I am for banning and eliminating this holiday all-together. You dont get a day off. You dont get any good presents. It is never as good as you hope it is going to be. And, if you are male, it is more stressful than just about any other day as you picture a year of no sex if you make one tiny misstep
It is that time of year again, my friends. It is the time of year where I turn from your generally lovable cranky old man into an outright Scrooge. You see, I am a very proud Scrooge of Valentines Day. A mere mention of the holiday causes a cold look to cross my face, my jaw to set and then I explode into a long, rambling rant where spit flies from my lips and I start foaming at the mouth and chewing on various pieces of furniture. Oh, my friends, my dear readers, do I hate and loathe and despise this holiday so much it makes my blood boil enough to cook a bag of Jolly Green Giant corn.
The origins of the holiday seem to be in debate. No one really knows where it came from but it probably has something to do with paganism, despite the fact a saints name has been attached to it. The early Christian church did a lot of co-opting of pagan rituals and themes to try and attract more people. You sort of have to picture the early Christians handing out flyers trying to get people to join with the words NOW WITH MORE PAGANISM in bold letters on there somewhere.
The entire holiday is entirely a commercial venture whatever its origins. This is true of most holidays, of course, but at least Christmas and Easter and Thanksgiving also has a component of getting together with family. There is a warmth to those holidays. Valentines Day is just about buying cards, finding the right restaurant for dinner and ads for jewelry. A holiday with murky origins quickly loses its true meaning along the way.
What I hate is the importance so many, particularly you women, put on the damn holiday. It is a date on the calendar. Why does this one day, chosen by society or, even worse, the advertisers, have so much meaning? Oh, most women these days tell me they dont put that much importance on the day. Most of these women are in relationships and, dollars to donuts, if you were to find them without a bouquet of flowers or a card or a dinner or presents of some kind they would be royally ticked off.
Once again, I will tell you a better way to have a random day to celebrate with your loved one. Throw the months of the year into one hat and the numbers 1 31 in another. Then you and your loved one take turns picking from each hat. If you get a date that does not exist (say, February 31) then toss that number and pick again until you get one that make sense. If that is too much work, then focus on your anniversary, because at least that date should have some meaning for you. Valentines Day has no meaning unless you work for a card or candy company or perhaps own a restaurant.
For the rest of us out there, those of us who do not have a Valentine, the entire day is like having needles jammed under your fingernails for 24 hours. It is a constant reminder that you are alone. Yes, you may hate the day and the concept, but you still wish you had someone else with you to rant and rave against it with as much vehemence as yourself.
All in all, I am for banning and eliminating this holiday all-together. You dont get a day off. You dont get any good presents. It is never as good as you hope it is going to be. And, if you are male, it is more stressful than just about any other day as you picture a year of no sex if you make one tiny misstep