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United Kingdom

Member Since 2004

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Monday Aug 08, 2005

Aug 8, 2005
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My friend Bekie commited suicide last week.

I'm fucking devastated. We all are.

She was like the last person I expected to do this. She was always so happy and bubbly and everything.

It's fucking scary. How easily a life can be taken away and how much hurt is left for the people left behind.

I still can't believe shes gone. I can't go to the fucking funeral either because I go on holiday THAT day. FFS. So I'll probably never believe that shes gone.

In a way I'm glad I'm not going, after the state I was in when I found out. Now I just feel like it isnt really happening. The funeral will only remind me that it is happening.

It's like nearly exactly a year since Coysh killed himself aswell.

WHY ?!

I dont know how I feel at the minute. Since I found out she committed suicide I'm feeling quite angry. Do they not stop to think about how everyone who is left behind will cope ?! I could NEVER do that to my family. No matter how bad I felt. I'm sorry if that sounds selfish. But being someone who lost their mother when they were 15, I cant even begin to imagine how her family feel when she caused her own death. Its bad enough to come to terms with when they die of other causes.

ARGH. I dont know what to think. I cant think anymore.
VIEW 15 of 15 COMMENTS
amoff:
my pleasure *hugs* xx
Aug 22, 2005
darkangelazrael:
No Problem Sweetness. I think a little empathy goes a long way. ANytime you need anyting just let me know. Glad you got away for a while. I really wish I could do the same thing. Things aren't so well here. I have no idea what's goin on with the woman I have fallen in love with. 4 friends have died this month and now my father is pretty sick. Just wish I could go camping for a weekend. It would really help the spirit i think. Thanks for the thoughts though. That makes me feel much better. Take care hon and have a great week ok!?

Sincerely, Ron. skull skull
Aug 22, 2005

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