I'm dreading it!

It was different on all my other birthdays because I was still in my 20s, well now I'm going into the big 30 I feel like I'm supposed to grow up more now, act 30 and wear business suits and shit lol. I just feel like I'm going to be stripped of all my fun stuff now. I know that isn't how it really goes but 30 is a whole new number lol

OK I might have gone a little over board on my discription but I don't know any other way to describe it. I don't really want to celebrate my birthday at all. I want to book a photoshoot and work on purpose so I don't have to think about it. I'm sure my husband has some trick up his sleeve for some dreaded party I honestly don't want to be apart of. It is bad enough that I'm already a mom to 5 amazing children at my age so I already feel old, but actually now seeing that number right around the corner makes me feel very old and crunchy :( no I'm not saying that anyone that is older than me is old or crunchy but it is just how I feel. It is kind of depressing actually.