i heard a quote this weekend that, although i'm agnostic, made me think and actually gave me some hope:
God doesn't call the prepared, He prepares the called. although this doesn't do anything for me in a religious way, i still found it comforting. i think it is absolutely a wonderful way of looking at things. instead of being mad that i'm going through all this difficult stuff, i should realize that it is preparing me for the rest of my life. next time i'm in a difficult situation, i will feel much stronger and know that i can get through it because i've gotten through everything else that has been thrown at me
in other news, i'm fucking horny
because of my back, any kind of sex is extremely painful. hopefully i'll start feeling better soon and can get back to my regularly scheduled tension-easing. i think next time i may go whole hog and ask the boyfriend to tie me up.
i love kinbaku, it's so interesting and beautiful and, most importantly, it feels delightful 
so i've been wanting to get a new tat for a while now (okay, let's not kid ourselves, i've wanted one since 5 minutes after i got the last one.... 
)i have a couple ideas in the works and i would appreciate any and all advice or comments 
1. Amarena is drawing me a cute cartoonish kitty that will eventually go on one of my shoulder blades. i'm thinking the left one, so it's above my heart, but that really depends on where i get the one i'll get to next. anyway, because my family is so conservative (especially my extended family) and because if i ever get married i want to be able to wear a dress without that showing on my back, that's going to wait until either i get married or until i'm reasonably certain i'm never going to get married.
2. i love lilies. they hold a special place in my heart, as my grandmother was especially fond of them. calla lilies are my favorite kind, and i would love to get a tat that has either 3 (i have 3 younger brothers) or 4 (symbolizing me and my brothers). for right now, i'm thinking that i want to get this one on my ribs on my left side, under my heart. i seem to be all about the symbolism what it comes to tattoos...... anywho, i found this great picture that i would like to adapt into a tattoo, either keeping it as is or adding another flower:
i want to wait a bit on that one though, because i don't want it to get all screwed up if i lose weight (which, god willing, i will do as soon as my back heals.)
3. the tat i'm thinking about getting soon (and this is the one i'd particularly like advice on) is a miniaturized version of this pic: 
although obviously just the squirrel and not the background. i'm thinking the inside of my right ankle would be a good place for it. the choice isn't as random as you may think- my friends in high-school call me 'squirrelly' or 'squirrel' although if i ever knew why, i've forgotten. but i like the picture, and it has meaning to me, which are my two criteria for tattoos.
i'd love any opinions i could get on any of these ideas
in other other news, i was going through the picture files on my computer to see if any could be deleted, and i found some cute ones that i thought might be fun to share. these are all from when i was in college (i think they range from junior to senior year). please enjoy
i used to be so in love with this halter...now my boobs are too big for me to wear it, as it's backless
one of my favorite shirts, even though i'm not a practicing catholic....i dunno that a practicing catholic would wear a shirt like this though...
hanging out in the dorm or the apartment
on the bus in milwaukee, on the way to Gallery Night
vacay with friends in DC
very old picture of me and the bf (before we started going out, actually)- i love that top, i got it in ireland. my natural hair color, too
just playing around with the camera
junior year the roomies and i got a pumpkin for the apartment. we named him 'Snags' because of his snaggletooth
more carving
screwing around
me being happy
and a semi-special treat for all you perverts out there
cheers guys! 
