netflix friggin rawks!
we've been members for a couple of years now and its so awesome to have movies and shows every single night. lately, we have been catching up on some series that we havent seen before and as a result, my two new favorite series are the 4400 and weeds. we also got to check out samauri jack and just last night clone wars. genndy tartakovsky is da shizzle fo rizzle.
so maybe its just my "time of the month" (ask avalonchase about how our "cycles" are synchronized...tres creepy) but i am feeling kind of..."eh" lately. not good. not bad. just "eh". aside from my regular interaction with jayratch and jynee i feel like a stranger in a crowded room. i post and interact when i can but with a few exceptions my contributions get overlooked or buried. not that i am wanting to be a showstopper and have people hanging on my every word. i just thought that out of all the onliine communities i could have chosen, this seemed like the best place for me to be who i really am (a sexual intellectual) and find kindred spirits.
see, i have always felt like a bit of an outcast of sorts. ever since i was a kid. well perhaps that aint the right word but i was in that weird group of people that could float between peer groups but didnt really have one of my own. i would hang with the D&D nerds on one day and play football with the jocks the next day. i would chill wiith the pretty girls at lunch and wait for the bus with the art kids. i was all over the place. but also, its not like i had anyone looking for me if i didnt show up.
the same is true today. outside of my immediate family, while i have tons of contacts for the various aspects of my life, i can't say that i have anyone with which i can truly connect on a regular basis. theres always a limit or a boundary or a time beyond which the contact doesnt happen. and its not for a lack of trying, thats for certain. i just wonder if its something about me. perhaps im too unrealistic.
maybe im just too demanding. maybe im just like my father too bold...
just once it would be nice to not feel like im jamming a square peg in a round hole.
we've been members for a couple of years now and its so awesome to have movies and shows every single night. lately, we have been catching up on some series that we havent seen before and as a result, my two new favorite series are the 4400 and weeds. we also got to check out samauri jack and just last night clone wars. genndy tartakovsky is da shizzle fo rizzle.
so maybe its just my "time of the month" (ask avalonchase about how our "cycles" are synchronized...tres creepy) but i am feeling kind of..."eh" lately. not good. not bad. just "eh". aside from my regular interaction with jayratch and jynee i feel like a stranger in a crowded room. i post and interact when i can but with a few exceptions my contributions get overlooked or buried. not that i am wanting to be a showstopper and have people hanging on my every word. i just thought that out of all the onliine communities i could have chosen, this seemed like the best place for me to be who i really am (a sexual intellectual) and find kindred spirits.
see, i have always felt like a bit of an outcast of sorts. ever since i was a kid. well perhaps that aint the right word but i was in that weird group of people that could float between peer groups but didnt really have one of my own. i would hang with the D&D nerds on one day and play football with the jocks the next day. i would chill wiith the pretty girls at lunch and wait for the bus with the art kids. i was all over the place. but also, its not like i had anyone looking for me if i didnt show up.
the same is true today. outside of my immediate family, while i have tons of contacts for the various aspects of my life, i can't say that i have anyone with which i can truly connect on a regular basis. theres always a limit or a boundary or a time beyond which the contact doesnt happen. and its not for a lack of trying, thats for certain. i just wonder if its something about me. perhaps im too unrealistic.
maybe im just too demanding. maybe im just like my father too bold...
just once it would be nice to not feel like im jamming a square peg in a round hole.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
phoenixgirl:
Avalon is right, it does take a bit for people to "take" to you...but i always look forward to your blogs...i have always felt like a bit of an outsider most of my life as well, and in "real-life" I only have a few close friends...but thts fine with me, its not about having a shit load of friends...and i sound hipocritical in that because apparently i have a shitload here, but only a few out of al them have contact with me on a regular basis, and those are my good friends--like you and Avalon, and Jay. Dont worry about getting a lot of responses from people, it will happen, be happy for the ones you get from those who matter most to you, because really thats who your writing for, because they are the ones who read and care...love you doll!!! 
joesph90:
I always read through your posts.....alot of the time I don't leave comments on peoples posts though......I just like to see what their up to. The more active you are on others posts, the more active people become with you.