I keep having this repetitive fantasy. Well, I don't know if I should call it a fantasy really...
You guys all know that I live in a really old house. This house has always got something going on. Maybe new doors one week, roof, floors, etc...Whatever. There is always some shit falling apart and/or being replaced. So for a long time now I can't take a shower in the upstairs bathroom. A bath yes, but a shower no. (I hate taking baths because they take to long.) So to remedy the no shower situation there is a shower stall in the basement. Now this basement is so decrepit and creepy!! And I get naked in it!! I don't know which is worse, the fact that it is nasty or that I don't care. I should say that it is only nasty because it is so creepy looking. I do clean it on a regular basis. With bleach. The only thing I don't clean is the ceiling because it's not really a ceiling at all. It is the wood for the floor above and the rafters supporting said floor. The reason I don't clean it is because it is covered in spider webs. Like in the movie Arachnaphobia. No kidding! I am terrified if I sweep it all the spiders will jump on me and bite me.
So here is the fantasy part. Lately whenever I take a shower, I think about horror movies. I think about Psycho, Pumpkinhead, The Children Under the Stairs, The Hills Have Eyes, Hell Raiser, Halloween, etc...But mostly I think about Texas Chainsaw Massacre because I swear, my basement makes me think of the repulsive meat processing plant at the end of the movie. I think about all this during the shower and then by the time I get out I have to dry off and get dressed really quick because I know at any moment Leatherface is going to come down the stairs and around the corner with his chainsaw roaring and chop me up!! I just know it!! Maybe I need some lockers in my basement to hide in...
You guys all know that I live in a really old house. This house has always got something going on. Maybe new doors one week, roof, floors, etc...Whatever. There is always some shit falling apart and/or being replaced. So for a long time now I can't take a shower in the upstairs bathroom. A bath yes, but a shower no. (I hate taking baths because they take to long.) So to remedy the no shower situation there is a shower stall in the basement. Now this basement is so decrepit and creepy!! And I get naked in it!! I don't know which is worse, the fact that it is nasty or that I don't care. I should say that it is only nasty because it is so creepy looking. I do clean it on a regular basis. With bleach. The only thing I don't clean is the ceiling because it's not really a ceiling at all. It is the wood for the floor above and the rafters supporting said floor. The reason I don't clean it is because it is covered in spider webs. Like in the movie Arachnaphobia. No kidding! I am terrified if I sweep it all the spiders will jump on me and bite me.
So here is the fantasy part. Lately whenever I take a shower, I think about horror movies. I think about Psycho, Pumpkinhead, The Children Under the Stairs, The Hills Have Eyes, Hell Raiser, Halloween, etc...But mostly I think about Texas Chainsaw Massacre because I swear, my basement makes me think of the repulsive meat processing plant at the end of the movie. I think about all this during the shower and then by the time I get out I have to dry off and get dressed really quick because I know at any moment Leatherface is going to come down the stairs and around the corner with his chainsaw roaring and chop me up!! I just know it!! Maybe I need some lockers in my basement to hide in...
VIEW 26 of 26 COMMENTS
windermere:
I'll send you a postcard
cleric:
now, if you step into a locker, watch oout, carrie wiil come find you and crush you between them like a tin can right out of the movie...