boundcreature

it is 4:10 a.m.

all i want is to be asleep.

i am staying up,

trying to finish the graphic artists guild promo

that i am illustrating and designing

as well as prepping a revision of the lecture i gave last semester at umass, amherst.

i am fucking tired.

i am moving forward,

not on passion,

but out of stubbornness.

this will be an unclean victory,

because i don't care if i win or lose.

i'm coming to learn now,

that i only have enough energy and enthusiasm in me,

to be dedicated to one thing.

the HAGAKURE says that when one thing becomes many things, it is bad.

i am starting to believe this.

would you rather do one thing exceptionally?

or four things mediocre-ally?

***

i am a well-spring of passion and crazy ideas.

i design and illustrate on a part-time basis...

there is no such thing as a part-time creative juggernaut.

after i finish this mess of stuff,

i am refusing all projects for the rest of the year.

my one thing is going to be the sign shop.

my hobbies are going to include the following:

1. exploring my creativity and becoming a better artist
2. playing with ideas for my magazines relaunch
3. playing with ideas for my graphic novels
4. dancing
5. holding whitesamurai until she falls asleep

it is a testament to my willpower (stubbornness? pig-headedness?) that i have lasted as long as i have.

***

that is all for now,
tomorrow:

danzig & doyle on 1 hour of sleep.