bonnieblu

I had such a good day today and about 5 mintues ago i hit a wall.
Got another email from Nick. It was pretty blaise, there about to get on a bus to somewhere for a job. Picking apples, .

I think im just overeacting and making things out of nothing but its really hard when you've got nothing to base anything on. If you follow me?

I think im finding this really hard because he's off experiencing the world and living his life and i feel that im not important because he doesnt single me out. Does that make sense? Am i being selfish becuase of that?

I hate this, i hate everything right now. Im sorry for the mopeyness but this sucks. I dont know if i should let him go or keep it until whenever. I dont know. I fel sick and sad and i just want to cry.

Yesterday i had this feeling that i didnt feel the need to write to him or anything because everything was okay and now i dont want to write to him because im getting these angsty feelings i dont want against him.

It just hurts so fucking much.

Oh yeah, happy fucking valentines day.