I bought my boob job with my Camel Bucks
or
How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bikers
Sometimes the life of a burlesque star is one of fame, glamour and free drinks, like last night.
And the sometimes, the life is a burlesque dancer is one of ...well...sometimes you show up at a venue and there is NO place to change and...
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or
How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bikers
Sometimes the life of a burlesque star is one of fame, glamour and free drinks, like last night.
And the sometimes, the life is a burlesque dancer is one of ...well...sometimes you show up at a venue and there is NO place to change and...
Read More
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
I've done 3 burlesque shows in 2 days.
Bikers are some fucked up people.
Also, I signed my first autograph as a burlesque performer
"Avoid The Clap.
Love,
Blue Valentine"
Bikers are some fucked up people.
Also, I signed my first autograph as a burlesque performer
"Avoid The Clap.
Love,
Blue Valentine"
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
toothpickmoe:
Hey, you're a public figure now. You've got to step up and be a role model.
prockgirlscout:
*wince*
This one isn't so bad, I guess.
*wince*
This one isn't so bad, I guess.
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
gilby:
That sounds like a fun weekend. 
alyk:
I just couldn't get that shit to work! Don't blame me, boo, blame Lindsay Lohan and her DUI.
But, I'm totally going to touch your boobs in October to make up for missing you this time.
But, I'm totally going to touch your boobs in October to make up for missing you this time.
Babies having babies
or
I'm a grandmother!!!!
About a week ago admiral_pants and I noticed a one Ms Violet Mae Kittenton was getting a little fat. Good . She always was a stringbean.
And then she kept getting fatter.
And we determined that in spite of my daily pleas of "Dear Violet. Please just be a fat ass and not an unwed teenage mother", she...
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or
I'm a grandmother!!!!
About a week ago admiral_pants and I noticed a one Ms Violet Mae Kittenton was getting a little fat. Good . She always was a stringbean.
And then she kept getting fatter.
And we determined that in spite of my daily pleas of "Dear Violet. Please just be a fat ass and not an unwed teenage mother", she...
Read More
VIEW 25 of 25 COMMENTS
gogobongo:
hey sugar, how are ya?
hopey:
How is all the titty show drama going?
Rough day in the life of this central Texas girl. It is hard for me to share personal tragedy when I'm not typing it out and a verbal "what's wrong" from a friend can force tears to spill forth through gritted teeth.
I quietly excused myself home, crawled under the covers and put on the 12:30am showing of King of the Hill.
After a while,...
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I quietly excused myself home, crawled under the covers and put on the 12:30am showing of King of the Hill.
After a while,...
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VIEW 18 of 18 COMMENTS
smuffy:
I'm not sure what day---most likely a sunday, but I'm not sure. I'll need to consult with alyk.
and yes I have your digits, girl.
and yes I have your digits, girl.
alyk:
I don't want a billboard, I just want to see yoooooooooooooooooooooooooooou!
We have offically booked the most insane and awesome gig for burlesque.
I will be performing burlesque on the same stage as Foghat.
yes
as in FOGHAT
I will be performing burlesque on the same stage as Foghat.
yes
as in FOGHAT
VIEW 15 of 15 COMMENTS
smuffy:
no I have no hotel info! last I heard was just the dates. gimme.
thefreak:
HA! Awesome.
-TM
-TM
so, if all goes well, I'll have bluevalentine.net back on may 12th. keep fingers crossed.
And, here are my final plans for New York City
I arrive in Newark at 4:33 pm. I'll take the train into the city and immediately check into my hotel, Murray Hill East, which is at 149 East 39th Street.
Party like its 1999
Go home Tuesday, May 29th around...
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And, here are my final plans for New York City
I arrive in Newark at 4:33 pm. I'll take the train into the city and immediately check into my hotel, Murray Hill East, which is at 149 East 39th Street.
Party like its 1999
Go home Tuesday, May 29th around...
Read More
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
gilby:
Good luck on the website.
Have a great trip.
Have a great trip.
hopey:
Sooo, do you want to come to the wedding? I am sending shit out this week.
So, as most of you know, bluevalentine.net, my website for over 3 years, was stolen from me after I did not renew the domain in time. The registration has expired but I'm not expecting to get it. I've finally let go and I'm thinking of moving everything to a new domain.
I'm thinking of combining my podcasts, photography stuff, and personal blog (and also thinking...
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I'm thinking of combining my podcasts, photography stuff, and personal blog (and also thinking...
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VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
thefreak:
Just think of ".org" as "An orgy of original BV material." Maybe that'll help you warm up to it. 
-TM
-TM
gogobongo:
hmmmm,
www.bestdrunkdialevar.com
www.tomwaitssuperfan.cominmybutt
www.bluevalentinewasminefirstbiatches.com
www.bluevalentinelikesitinthepooper.com
these are just off the top of my head. they may already be taken. You're aces babe.
www.bestdrunkdialevar.com
www.tomwaitssuperfan.cominmybutt
www.bluevalentinewasminefirstbiatches.com
www.bluevalentinelikesitinthepooper.com
these are just off the top of my head. they may already be taken. You're aces babe.
Attention all folks who will be in NYC from May 26th - May 29th or who would like to be.
Its official. I got my plane ticket today. Come keep me company in the big apple. Feel free to share a hotel room with me. I won't try to do you up the butt.
Its official. I got my plane ticket today. Come keep me company in the big apple. Feel free to share a hotel room with me. I won't try to do you up the butt.
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
thefreak:
Damn, ya couldn't have come and given me teh buttsecks when I was just there? 
-TM
-TM
illyria:
Are you in Big Star Burlesque??? I remember seeing it somewhere in the boards. You must know my good friend Cassandra?
Don't piss off momma when she hasn't had bread in 7 days and is all hopped up on mini-thins
Holy fucking bacon on a bagel..
So, today was our first burlesque rehersal in awhile. We have a show saturday at 10:30 pm. Tickets available now at http://www.bigstarburlesque.com *cough*
ANYWHO,
Rehearsal. 8pm. Instead of yesterday because everyone was all "oh no, stupid jew! It's the day...
Read More
Holy fucking bacon on a bagel..
So, today was our first burlesque rehersal in awhile. We have a show saturday at 10:30 pm. Tickets available now at http://www.bigstarburlesque.com *cough*
ANYWHO,
Rehearsal. 8pm. Instead of yesterday because everyone was all "oh no, stupid jew! It's the day...
Read More
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
toothpickmoe:
Mmm, bacon...
smuffy:
my fingers smell like pussy.
I hope your show goes well on saturday.
I hope your show goes well on saturday.
Like....woah. It was a sea of women in assless chaps sportin red scars from nipple to just under the breast.
woah.