blueleftshoe

*copied from myspace but I think it does good in describing myself as a whole right now so I post it here too.



truth is pretty obvious


There is that frustration of not knowing where to turn next for the next happy buzz of life. I tell myself if I can't be happy with nothing then I'll never learn to be happy with everything. Happiness will never be finding that missing piece that will complete you it's more like find that part inside you that controls being happy and content then just keeping it on. Instead I always just find that nagging little piece that just prevents it from being and I lose interest in everything around me. I can find happiness for brief moments but I don't know if I find the brief moments happy or I just find the ability to be happy with whatever is there there is a big difference I haven't decided yet. A lot right now is just rough I don't know it's all about trying to figure things out. Am I barking up all the wrong trees? It seems I do nothing but make wrong choices anymore so it wouldn't be no big suprise. I'm always telling people that when someone is saying something to you well they're saying something to you. If someone tells you they don't want something serious well that means you won't get someone serious about you. If you get someone you doesn't have time for you well that means you don't have someone who has time for you. Life always gives you the answers and they're always pretty simple it's just a matter of wanting to listen to them and a matter of thinking with about what you want to happen. Everything is usually pretty concrete I just tend to live in a fantasy land I should just avoid that.

I want to put the TNT in the basement and just blow all to hell right about now.