I am going to get this printed on a poster and post it in my living room so that it greets potential new roommates....
Since you guys are moving in with me there are a few things you should know.
#1 every time you come home I will greet you as loudly & obnoxiously as possible saying "hooray you're back!"
#2 sometimes I set up a tent in the living room & sleep in it for a week because let's face it, it's a jungle out there.
#3 if you ever hear me screaming obscenities on my phone it's cool, I'm probably just ventin...g about you to your mom
#4 I lost a furry, poisonous pet spider like a month ago. If you see him please don't smash him. .
#5 if you come home one night & can't get in it's probably because I changed the locks but really it's your own damn fault. I probably whispered the secret password to get in several times. Pay better attention.
#6 I like to sign my roommates up to be organ & blood donors.
#7 if you find notes pinned to your door saying "I know what you did" it's probably because I know what you did.
#8 I think it perfectly appropriate to talk like a pirate, all the time.
#9 I put put cookies for the sandman every night. If you touch them, I can't even write out what will happen to you.
#10 if you see me sharpening knives watch out. I'm dangerous.
Soooo...other than that it should be all good! Can't wait for you to move in!
Since you guys are moving in with me there are a few things you should know.
#1 every time you come home I will greet you as loudly & obnoxiously as possible saying "hooray you're back!"
#2 sometimes I set up a tent in the living room & sleep in it for a week because let's face it, it's a jungle out there.
#3 if you ever hear me screaming obscenities on my phone it's cool, I'm probably just ventin...g about you to your mom
#4 I lost a furry, poisonous pet spider like a month ago. If you see him please don't smash him. .
#5 if you come home one night & can't get in it's probably because I changed the locks but really it's your own damn fault. I probably whispered the secret password to get in several times. Pay better attention.
#6 I like to sign my roommates up to be organ & blood donors.
#7 if you find notes pinned to your door saying "I know what you did" it's probably because I know what you did.
#8 I think it perfectly appropriate to talk like a pirate, all the time.
#9 I put put cookies for the sandman every night. If you touch them, I can't even write out what will happen to you.
#10 if you see me sharpening knives watch out. I'm dangerous.
Soooo...other than that it should be all good! Can't wait for you to move in!
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
mrbubblewarp:
but what if David and I have that up on the wall and YOU move in??
bearnked:
those are hilarious and a great warning! I wouldn't want to live with someone that has a pet fuzzy spider. lol