blossy

I am going to get this printed on a poster and post it in my living room so that it greets potential new roommates....

Since you guys are moving in with me there are a few things you should know.
#1 every time you come home I will greet you as loudly & obnoxiously as possible saying "hooray you're back!"

#2 sometimes I set up a tent in the living room & sleep in it for a week because let's face it, it's a jungle out there.

#3 if you ever hear me screaming obscenities on my phone it's cool, I'm probably just ventin...g about you to your mom

#4 I lost a furry, poisonous pet spider like a month ago. If you see him please don't smash him. .

#5 if you come home one night & can't get in it's probably because I changed the locks but really it's your own damn fault. I probably whispered the secret password to get in several times. Pay better attention.

#6 I like to sign my roommates up to be organ & blood donors.

#7 if you find notes pinned to your door saying "I know what you did" it's probably because I know what you did.

#8 I think it perfectly appropriate to talk like a pirate, all the time.

#9 I put put cookies for the sandman every night. If you touch them, I can't even write out what will happen to you.

#10 if you see me sharpening knives watch out. I'm dangerous.


Soooo...other than that it should be all good! Can't wait for you to move in!