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bloomsday

Cleveland, OH

Member Since 2004

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Tuesday Apr 04, 2006

Apr 3, 2006
0
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A DREAM, UNINTERPRETED

I am looking for a vacation and I choose a serene and beautiful place I know: Devil's Tower. It's snowing there, and I find myself among happy families sledding down slopes under the zen stone volcano plug pillar (that, by the way, celebrates its 100th anniversary as America's first national monument this year, assholes...) Amid the frolic, I come upon a kid, sitting in front of a television, playing a video game. This is outside, in the snow, in the evening shadow of
Devil's Tower. The game console and "joystick" look suspiciously like that Sears Atari knock-off that I got for Christmas a quarter of a century or so ago.
I watch the screen action and see that the game's protagonist is decending down an underwater hole. The kid's hands on the joystick are frantically trying to "weigh down" his game protagonist (an obscenely proportioned anime princess, I believe) so that she sinks to the bottom to reveal the game's conclusion. She floats down, past jellyfish, past dangerous and unknown deep sea creatures.
Suddenly, I am the game's protagonist, floating past dark danger, letting all the air out of my lungs, taking in and breathing water as I decend. I hit bottom gently and find myself in an evil wizard's laboratory. I am quickly scooped up by the wizard and tossed into a fishbowl. I pound on the rounded glass and see other fishbowls containing others who have decended before me. As the wizard sprinkles fish food into my bowl (perhaps he's not so evil after all...), and it floats down past my face, I realize I am not alone in this bowl. I am here with Jesus Christ, who never actually died on the cross, but floated down the same watery hole 2000 years ago, and has been here, trapped, ever since.
GAME OVER.

[p.s.: I woke up with a hard on.]

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