bleeder

This is my Anti-Valentine's Day post.

I had a better post up a few hours ago but, I have something burning that Id like to share.

I thought that me and my ex broke up under good terms. She was a great gal and I thought we shared alot of moments. Therefore, we decided to stay friends. We both agreed we got along so well and that we met by talking so much in the first place. I was happy with how it turned out.

Then I found out very quickly just how fake she was. Its was too easy for her to stop talking to me very much anymore and start flirting around all over the place again. Gee.....its barely even been a few weeks and she acts like nothing was even between us. Fuck, even when we were together she acted like that alot anyways.

I had no problem with her being a SG. I accepted that she posed nude. What I didn't respect was all of the guys that were always making lewd comments. Either they didn't know she wasnt single or just didn't care. Either way my ex didn't really tell them to stop or correct them.
That was my first mistake. I should have seen that sign.

I knew in the start something wasn't right. I could just tell. I ignored my instincts tho because I was lonely. I wanted to think that someone really cared for me and wanted to be with me. Then I see them change so quickly. Feelings and everything. Now my ex has no problem flirting with whomever she can. I strayed away from that out of respect for her feelings. She could give a shit less to do the same. Funny how her feelings for me just as quickly transferred to a new guy.

Right after we split up we stopped talking. I always kept MSN open to save time for her but, she barely was on. I didn't expect it to be the same but, a simple "hello" would have been nice. Especially when she had the time to post to all her other "friends".

Wow. Lets get into our relationship. I admit to my flaws. i have a hard time with trust so I ended up breaking up with her twice. That WAS my fault. What wasn't my fault was her constant mood swings, her ignoring me when she wanted to be a bitch, and me having to be the calm one.

I did everything for that girl. Paid 160 euro a train trip to see her as often as I could. Spending 60euro to take her to nice restaurants. Treating her like a queen. She even had the nerve to ask me to buy her something after we broke up! Sorry. I'm not one of your net groupies that will buy you shit for nothing.

I accepted her for her faults but, when I messed up it was always thrown in my face. It wasn't acceptable when I messed up but ok when she did. I can remember all the times she hung up on me or ignored me because she was spoiled.

Now she can be with and flirt with all the guys she wants. I wouldn't expect less from her. Not after I seen how she turned out

"I see your true colors shining through"

If you made it this far....well, I commend you for reading my ramblings. If you know me well; you know I will do what I can to help you and be a friend but, if you hurt me I will burn the bridge between us so quick.

If my ex is reading this....well, I hope she is. She makes me sick. She had no problem letting me go. It was easier than dealing with my faults even tho she had so many of her own. I am not upset we are split up. I am mad at how fake she turned out and how I fell for it once again like I have so many times before. She fooled me with her smile, with the words she said, with the way she kissed and held me. It disgusts me to realize the feelings I had for her. She didn't deserve them and I allowed her to get to me. It was my fault for trusting her. I realize that but, you have to trust once in awhile.
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To all my friends and anyone who reads this. As alot of you know, I am a very passionate person and I'm not afraid to let my feelings out. What you just read was something that was eating away at me. It was something that I wanted to share with all of you in my friends box. You are all important to me and I want to share all the things going on in my life. Good or bad. I AM sorry tho if I offended any of you.

As far as my ex goes. Well, I know this will bother her because she cares so much of what everyone thinks of her on here anyways. Me? I could give a fuck less. If I end up losing friends off of my list for sharing this than alright. I know my true friends will stick by. Thats all that matters to me.

Special thanks to KeineLiebe andMissshelley for being there to talk to me.

Any of you had a similar fucked up relationship to share??