blasfemme

it certainly looks like my heart, except it's all cracked, chipped, and just plain broken.

i've been crying for almost an hour straight, i miss him so much...everyday i am only reminded of how much i really love him. i go back and forth, for protection. somedays i deny it til the cows come home, other days i wear it on my sleeve. seeing him is so bittersweet, the hugs make my little girl squeal. i wish everything had not gotten all fucked up. i wish.....

i'll deal, i always do. today it's just so heavy....i always cry when he goes away.

i'm not looking for sympathy or words of wisdom, just a simple purging of my soul...and yes, i'm aware he will see.

but it isn't like he doesn't already know, i suspect he may even "feel" me.....

"i felt you come in..."

that made me smile...and cry.

have a lovely day all.