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blackflame

College Park

Member Since 2004

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Friday Jul 02, 2004

Jul 2, 2004
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So, another entry, another day. I suppose this is where I start 'dishing' about my social life, hrmm?

Well, lessee. The past week I've been flat on my back 'cause even though I'm only 24 my back is apparently 80.

Yeah, I know. Sexy.

I'm not generally someone to kiss and tell, nor do I do 'smalltalk.'

So umm... yeah. So there I was. Doing stuff.

This weekend I'm headed over to VA for a Werewolf game. Wierdly enough an ex of mine (she wouldn't be an ex if she hadn't moved back to Ohio, le sigh) who's visiting the DC area for the 4th. Apparently her engaged-to-be-fiance is gonna go do stuff conspicuously alone (read: likely shopping for an engagement ring) so she's gonna come along to the Werewolf game. Her enthusiasm for it (Is it a Larp? Is it is it? Can I come? Please!?) reminded me partially of how a great a girlfriend she was. So, oddly enough, I get to spend Saturday pretending to be the big brother of her "jail-bait little sister" charachter (her words, can we begin to see why I she was a great gf?) getting all reminded of why I fell in love with her over a year ago whle her current boyfriend goes shopping for a wedding ring.

Still not sure how it's going to work out, hopefully not too painfully. We ended on really good terms (we still yak over IM frequently) and only because she was moving to Ohio and neither of us was good at the LDR thing. I think I still love her, not in that 'in love' kind of way, but in that I'll probably remember her until the day I die sort of way. Because I still really care about her in that way, I want her to be happy, and this future-fiance guy seems to make her really happy. So I'm really happy for her in that way. Really sad for me, though.

I generally am the type to err on the side of action as opposed to inaction. Mostly because that way I don't have to think and pine away after 'what might have been.' Except I keep tripping into feelings for people that end up moving away for school or work reasons. She was the reason I made the 'lives locally long term' rule for who I do and do not allow myself to fall for. Because I'm still thinking about what might have been with her.

So it's probably a good thing I have plans to get drunk and shoot off fireworks on Sunday. Maybe if I'm lucky, which I'm generally not, there will be some new hot chick there in that way people you know happen to have friends who are hot chicks you never knew until that one party kind of way. Maybe, just maybe, she might actually be interesting instead of the usual vapid generically boring hot chick I tend to meet. That way maybe I won't spend all of Sunday thinking about what might have been. Whatever the case, I think I'm planning on getting thouroughly sloshed.

Ok, so one bit of kiss and tell. One of the reasons I privately think it's a damn shame is that she had the potential to get really kinky. When things progressed to that point where you start letting the other person see how incredibly kinky you can be, she was just as enthusiastic for it as she was for the Werewolf game. Which was damn hot. I only got so far with her in the time we had together-- she was here on an internship that was ending, and I don't just drop into the whole Dominant Sadist thing full scale with someone who's just learning the ropes (and she looked so good in them!) But she had definite potential. And it's not going to go anywhere with this guy as far as I can tell. Which is a damn shame.

So how's that for juicy?

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