I stubbed my toe on the sidewalk this morning going to get the paper. It looks like I took a sander to the side of my toe, pretty bitchin! Not.... Its my own fault though the effort it would have taken to put on a pair of sneakers was just too much to think of at 8am. I took my tree down, decorations away, cleaned my kitchen, changed the sheets and had a half pot of coffee all before 10am.
I gave up smoking. What the fuck am I thinking. I love cigarettes. I love the smell, taste, the feeling I get off a good strong puff in the morning. But alas I am stopping. Im too fat to be a smoker. Im going to die alot sooner than I really need or want too. So I figure stop the smoking, than begin on weight loss. Baby steps motherfucker baby steps. Maybe if I lose weight and get a somewhat sexy figure I will pick the smokes back up but its got to be one or the other cant be a fat ass like I am and smoke a pack and half a day and think im gonna live forever. There arent enough virgins left in the world for me to pull a Liz Bathory and drain them of thier blood to look and feel immortal so figure I better give myself alittle help. So yeah cold turkey no smokes. Damnit!
I have done something to someone for awhile now that im not proud of but I did it anyways because I am a lonely self involved person I stopped doing it almost a week ago and although that person was hurt by my actions and I ended the friendship, its over. Im not going to do it again with a new person at least I am going to try my hardest not too and thats a beginning right? I didnt cheat on anyone, or kill, stab or disembowel anyone but I wasnt honest with someone and he paid the price in emotions because of me. Im not a very nice person and could equally be called a fucking bitch and be true, but Im trying to change this about myself and be a nicer person to others. I have to think why I dont have many real life friends and its because im not happy with who I am so I have started trying not to always compare myself to other people. This entry is turning to a pile of shit and Im thinking too much. So ta ta
I gave up smoking. What the fuck am I thinking. I love cigarettes. I love the smell, taste, the feeling I get off a good strong puff in the morning. But alas I am stopping. Im too fat to be a smoker. Im going to die alot sooner than I really need or want too. So I figure stop the smoking, than begin on weight loss. Baby steps motherfucker baby steps. Maybe if I lose weight and get a somewhat sexy figure I will pick the smokes back up but its got to be one or the other cant be a fat ass like I am and smoke a pack and half a day and think im gonna live forever. There arent enough virgins left in the world for me to pull a Liz Bathory and drain them of thier blood to look and feel immortal so figure I better give myself alittle help. So yeah cold turkey no smokes. Damnit!
I have done something to someone for awhile now that im not proud of but I did it anyways because I am a lonely self involved person I stopped doing it almost a week ago and although that person was hurt by my actions and I ended the friendship, its over. Im not going to do it again with a new person at least I am going to try my hardest not too and thats a beginning right? I didnt cheat on anyone, or kill, stab or disembowel anyone but I wasnt honest with someone and he paid the price in emotions because of me. Im not a very nice person and could equally be called a fucking bitch and be true, but Im trying to change this about myself and be a nicer person to others. I have to think why I dont have many real life friends and its because im not happy with who I am so I have started trying not to always compare myself to other people. This entry is turning to a pile of shit and Im thinking too much. So ta ta
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anyway, good luck!!
cheers!!