So I found out where all the cute lesbians in SF are stashed!!! There was a club night last night, but I refuse to put its name on here because it was an underground kinda thing and i'm not even about to give an edge to the competition, lol.

So I went to Club _____ because I heard it was the only lesbian club night in the city that played house music (HOUSE MUSIC). It's at a place that's normally a gay man bar but on this particular night was for lesbians. I'm assuming since it was not very publicized that the women there were um, actually gay. I stepped in and ALL of the girls looked like femmey model girls in their late 20's, which is perfect because i'm sure as hell not dating anyone my age anymore. I was dancing to GOOD MUSIC on a dancefloor with lesbians that weren't 500 pound hairy butches that actually had some good dance moves. There was only a few, i'd say about a hundred or so, so I got a feeling it was the "secret society of hot femmes that listen to house" and they all stared at me as a newcomer. I realized I needed a partner in crime and walked up to one of the three gay men in the place that accidentally thought it was gay man night. He was a punky gay guy named Mark that recognized me from the goth club I went to on my birthday when the DJ yelled out my name.

Told you i'm the city's gay debutante!

He bought me so much liquor...I had a sea breeze, a buttery nipple, a lemon drop, and a purple hooter last night...I wanted to flirt with some of the girls but was too shy and decided not to attempt to "slur sweet nothings" into their ear. One girl in particular was like one of the prettiest lesbians i've ever seen. I was like, "Um, ma'am, can you PLEASE stop being this hot? My eye has popped out of my head and is swinging by its ganglion on the dancefloor in time to the strobe light." She had long black hair and a black leather jacket a la Angelina Jolie in Gia. I was confused because she would always dance near me and look over but not smile, and once she literally stopped in front of me and looked right in my eyes, giving me some sort of cold pout and then she left the bar. Then she came back two hours later, danced by me again for five minutes and then left the bar the second time. I don't know why she did that.

I had the best time that i've had since I turned 21 last night at that divey, dingy little bar. Now that I know this secret society of hot lesbians exists in SF, I will definitely be at that bar any time they have that night.

I'm lonely here in SF. This is a big, hollow city. I'm trying to find someone but am apprehensive about this whole meeting someone in a bar thing. All I want is for someone to call me a girlfriend and be with me at gay pride, it's been my daydream ever since I came out. I had this lesbian friend that helped me come out my first year in college and at gay pride, she flirted with me a lot and held my hand, put her arm around me, watched the bands with me at the civic center afterwards, etc. But then she told me just wanted to be friends even though she tried to kiss me the day before. I ran because I was afraid.

I want things to be like that again at gay pride, it was nice the first time even though it was make-believe.