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bionicfemme

Member Since 2002

Followers 82 Following 46

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Monday Aug 05, 2002

Aug 5, 2002
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Agggggghhh. I got like no sleep last night. Laid in my bed with Garbage playing and for some reason started crying because again, my PMS gets me all emotional, i'm probably going to start today or tomorrow. I hear in France if you kill someone and you're a woman on PMS, they reconsider your sentence in court. OK, if I ever kill anyone i'll have to take them to France first. It's a plan.

Nah I dunno, I just started thinking about how Dia's right and i've gotta get the fuck out of here because the scene's completely dead. I was thinking about Alyson and how much she loves Celeste and Christina and how she's with her husband but flirts all the time. It's fucked up. But I guess it's understandable that the coolest women I know are taken, they should be. Well anyway now I have horrible bags under my eyes and I look like i'm 75 years old, this is ridiculous.

I have a friend and I don't know what to do about her. She is the sweetest thing since C&H started running the sugar business and she's adored me for a year now. She wears costumes that look like they're from the 1800's while walking down the street, she looks like a character right out of little house on the prarie. All ruffle skirts and Mary Poppins boots. She's actually one of the people that's the most like me out of all of my friends. I often think that she'd make a good girlfriend, and we are both lonely to the point of insanity, but I don't want to fuck up our friendship. She's so sweet, she's never even kissed anybody before, and I don't want to hurt her. What if I jump into dating her and then realize it somehow doesn't work out, I think that would just push her over the edge. She needs someone completely infatuated with her. I just don't want to hurt her. Alyson keeps insisting that we get together, since we have absolutely everything in common, but I can't do it, I just have to stay her friend. I won't hurt her the same way N hurt me...no, not like that. It's really a shame, she wants a punky-looking chivalrous tomboy (me) and I want an intelligent, funny, compassionate woman (her). I don't know about anything anymore, i'm going to have to get a sugar doughnut to straighten things out. Yum.

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