bionicfemme

Yes, you asked for it...here is a detailed list of

The men I have dated!!!!

Guy 1: I was 12. He was this cute Mexican guy that I danced with at some chick's party. He was totally dorky and all into star wars and stuff, it was cool.

Guy 2: I was 14. He was a white boy with a blonde fro, way into Monty Python and making prank calls. He'd call people at three in the morning and just say, "Your mom." and hang up.

Guy 3: A homie cholo named Steve. He was half Mexican half Italian, he was really hot. But then he dumped me for some chick that looked exactly like me. Go figure.

Guy 4: A homie cholo football jock from another school. He originally liked my best friend but settled for me. He was a total ass and I guess told all these jocks from my school that he didn't want to go out with me anymore since I wouldn't screw him on the second date. Jerk-off. He cheated on me with a couple of other girls too. Then, what's really creepy is that 2 years after I broke up with him, a friend of mine went to his house and said he had A SHRINE BUILT TO ME? Aaagh!

Guy 5: Another homie cholo. He tried to give me a good night kiss in his car and in an overwhelming wave of nausea, I shoved him away before he touched my lips and RAN into my apartment! I felt so sick, like I could barely breathe. My friends made fun of me for being frigid. Little did I know it was really because I was gay.

Guy 6: Adrian, a black punk rock breakdancer that occasionally wore women's clothing. He's such a beautiful boy. He was my only real boyfriend. All we did all day was make fun of things, dance, and pretend we were living in an RPG. It was a good age for us to be in love; we were 16. I broke up with him because he cheated on me, and every time we tried to get back together, he'd do something shitty, like give another girl roses in front of me. So I gave up on him and moved to San Francisco. The last time I saw him, he asked me to marry him. He begs for me back to this day and doesn't want to believe i'm a lesbian. Ooops.

Guy 7: This really nasty fat guy that worked at the literary magazine I used to volunteer for. He asked me on a date and I figured, hey, why not, it had been two years since Adrian. He faked a brain anorism in the restaurant and scared the shit out of me. When he took me home, he tried to kiss me at the door and I again shoved him away from me, nauseated. I ran upstairs to my friend Gabby (this HOTTTT Mexican bi girl who's a friend of mine) and basically hugged her really tight until all the wind was knocked out of me, and I cried because I didn't know why I was "frigid." Gabby consoled me, called me a princess, and she didn't know that I really liked her instead.

So that was about two years ago. Now I know, and i've grown so much. And I think this year, although passing by quickly, has made me older than any other year before it. This year, I got my first girlfriend. I lost my virginity. My father and I patched up 20 years of differences. My first article to be published on a wide scale is coming out.

So many things have happened...I wonder what next year has in store for me. I bet it's going to be one more trying adventure. I can't wait to see where it takes me.