Roaaaawrawwwwroawwwwrrrrr!!!!
Rrrgrr! I don't know why, but I woke up filled with vigor. I feel like a hearty, snip-snappy pirate o' love. This is good, as I have 10,000 things to do today. I'm finally getting out of that funk that "8 reasons" inadvertantly caused.
"Say you made a painting that was sad, only instead of having more of an effect on the audience, it had more of an effect on you. Like you painted the sea and you were depressed about that picture for 2 days" -Me
"Uhh...I would never be as stupid as to create something that intense!" -Tanya
"Ah you. Nevermind!" -Me
Last night we made a pact; if we are both single by the time we're 45, she's going to be my wife. We also realized that as best friends, we are complete idiots in the game of love, we fall for the most dumb-ass, rude people when we're cute and nice and fuck! We don't deserve that shit. All would go according to plan if we didn't have to wait until we were 45! Haha.
We were deconstructing life last night and I think we found out the ultimate end to the ultimate end of everything. We even figured out why I always get in these shitty relationships. Psychotic people date me because they're psychotic and they don't give a fuck if they're sadistic, as they're insane and have no souls. Good people don't want to date me because they think i'm a nice person and don't want to be responsible for breaking my heart. Tanya's advice? Stop being so Olsen twin pure. I don't really know how to accomplish that; maybe i'll just put on some fake press-on nails and go to intensive Whore Camp (TM) to learn the art of the slutbag ho.
So maybe i'm not dirty but...i'm jaded! Does that count? Actually i'm not really all that jaded. I get bitter and whine about women, but when I start to date someone I get enthusiastic and stupid over them, thinking this is a fresh new start. BARF. This is not a sitcom on ABC, things won't change!
We also noticed that women only want someone if they're really fucked up, because then they think "Ah, I could help them, my love could turn them around. With enough nurturing, they won't be an asshole anymore." I guess I need to go to asshole camp too.
Christ! I can't help it that I don't like to hurt people. Tanya says the only way things will get better is if I treat everyone like a casual make-out buddy and be a self-seeking bitch. I don't have the heart to do that.
Bah. I told her that someone on the SG boards posted a thread asking people if they were into BDSM and I wanted to say "I don't have any whips or chains, but I tell the truth and am a good person; that seems to scare women more than any nipple clamps. If you're a real masochist, come to me for love, because my genuinity is a hell of a lot scarier than anal beads."
Oh dear...I just got an invite to join the "angry little schwa" group on yahoo. I think Malady is up to his old tricks. Why can't the man leave me alone? And how in the hell did he get my email address???
Rrrgrr! I don't know why, but I woke up filled with vigor. I feel like a hearty, snip-snappy pirate o' love. This is good, as I have 10,000 things to do today. I'm finally getting out of that funk that "8 reasons" inadvertantly caused.
"Say you made a painting that was sad, only instead of having more of an effect on the audience, it had more of an effect on you. Like you painted the sea and you were depressed about that picture for 2 days" -Me
"Uhh...I would never be as stupid as to create something that intense!" -Tanya
"Ah you. Nevermind!" -Me
Last night we made a pact; if we are both single by the time we're 45, she's going to be my wife. We also realized that as best friends, we are complete idiots in the game of love, we fall for the most dumb-ass, rude people when we're cute and nice and fuck! We don't deserve that shit. All would go according to plan if we didn't have to wait until we were 45! Haha.
We were deconstructing life last night and I think we found out the ultimate end to the ultimate end of everything. We even figured out why I always get in these shitty relationships. Psychotic people date me because they're psychotic and they don't give a fuck if they're sadistic, as they're insane and have no souls. Good people don't want to date me because they think i'm a nice person and don't want to be responsible for breaking my heart. Tanya's advice? Stop being so Olsen twin pure. I don't really know how to accomplish that; maybe i'll just put on some fake press-on nails and go to intensive Whore Camp (TM) to learn the art of the slutbag ho.
So maybe i'm not dirty but...i'm jaded! Does that count? Actually i'm not really all that jaded. I get bitter and whine about women, but when I start to date someone I get enthusiastic and stupid over them, thinking this is a fresh new start. BARF. This is not a sitcom on ABC, things won't change!
We also noticed that women only want someone if they're really fucked up, because then they think "Ah, I could help them, my love could turn them around. With enough nurturing, they won't be an asshole anymore." I guess I need to go to asshole camp too.
Christ! I can't help it that I don't like to hurt people. Tanya says the only way things will get better is if I treat everyone like a casual make-out buddy and be a self-seeking bitch. I don't have the heart to do that.
Bah. I told her that someone on the SG boards posted a thread asking people if they were into BDSM and I wanted to say "I don't have any whips or chains, but I tell the truth and am a good person; that seems to scare women more than any nipple clamps. If you're a real masochist, come to me for love, because my genuinity is a hell of a lot scarier than anal beads."
Oh dear...I just got an invite to join the "angry little schwa" group on yahoo. I think Malady is up to his old tricks. Why can't the man leave me alone? And how in the hell did he get my email address???
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
"she's the sweetest girl..."
AURGH.
Why is being a nice person such a bad thing? I'll never understand that.
BURN BERLIN BURN!!!!
Off to Whore/Asshole camp!!!
Actually, yes, maybe I will sound like a fuck up, but I think when I go clubbing this week I will try being an arrogant asshole and see what happens. I'll give you the test results after the experiment has concluded.