bionicfemme

Thank you all for your encouragement and nice words. I do admit that I lost a bit of control, but sometimes I like losing control. It lets me know i'm still alive.

I only went in guns blazing because Malady started calling me various names and stereotypes. I wasn't angry because he disagreed with me, but angry with the cliches and stereotypes he tossed my way. His jeering ignited that brutal, primal flame in me that comes out in various spectacular intervals. I suppose I let loose on occassion because I was brutally abused verbally for most of my life and forced to remain quiet, so nowadays when someone insults me it's like mixing a molotov cocktail. Hardly anyone makes it out alive. And I don't just do it to protect myself, I also do it for others when I see them being hurt.

Long ago I said I was segmented into 3 women and the third was a maelstrom of passionate wrath. I guess the third woman possessed me last night. She's kind of fun, isn't she? She's my favorite guest star.

That same explosive emotion you saw last night manifests itself in all things with me, whether it is arguments or love. I'm capable of loving people with that same energy too. I run on Napalm and caffiene.

Quiet returns after the storm. Didn't you know? My bitch slaps smell like Chanel's "Allure" and my ass-kickings leave star shaped prints.

Beethoven's 4th movement of his pastoral symphony (Gewitter, Sturm) was playing when I fought last night. It was the perfect soundtrack.

A toast! To the members of SG who make my heart glad. May the fates favor you.

Listening to Garbage's "Drive You Home" and daydreaming about stuff. I'm a happy girl. I think O is such a wonderful person, to have such a good conscience.