I'm a slacker. Homework, what's that? I don't really feel like doing anything tonight...and Spanish blows!!!!
I feel like I have learned much from my previous relationship with N. Now I know what things I will tolerate and what things I won't, and I would rather end a relationship as soon as it goes downhill than prolong the horrid thing for 4 months like last time.
Stacey has a bad habit of making fun of me when her friends are around, but being really sweet when we're alone. Tonight we were at the LGBT meeting and she was teasing me relentlessly to the point where the whole group felt uncomfortable. Finally, she made one last comment that really pissed me off, so I didn't say a word, I just got up and left. She ran after me yelling that she was sorry but I didn't bother looking back, I just went home and listened to music. I didn't even really feel any emotion. It was just a process.
So she called me five minutes later apologizing out the ass and I told her "Listen, i'm not going to be your bitch, so don't treat me like that because I know you're sweet when no one else is around, so act like it" and then she was like "Well maybe you're just really sensitive" and I said "Or, um, it could be the fact that you're just an ass" and she kept apologizing, so I forgave her. Then I said I would like to hang out with her more, since we don't see each other very often when we're alone, we're always surrounded by 50,000 of her friends that point and giggle when we flirt with each other. What is this, 5th grade?
I guess tonight I realized how immature she is. I know she has a lot of growing up to do; after all, she's just an 18 year old freshman. I don't really think our dating could develop into anything serious even if we tried really hard. Oh well, Alyson thought the same thing about Celeste when she first met her. I guess i'll just have fun with whatever it is we have, even if she doesn't seem to be doing much to maintain it. I think if she stays with her lack of effort it won't last long. I'm glad I drew the no sex until we're committed boundary because I think this time I won't get attatched.
Everything will be easier this way. Sadly, i'm beginning to realize all women are becoming a blur; they all seem to have the same weird commitment phobias or psychotic episodes and I guess i'm too lazy to be anybody's hero anymore. They're becoming a process, and it hurts to know that i'm losing my childlike enthusiasm about it all. I think the apathy is good for me though, i'll get less attatched and less upset about being alone.
The truth is, it's been a very long time since i've even found a girl that i've been able to talk about poetry with.
I feel like I have learned much from my previous relationship with N. Now I know what things I will tolerate and what things I won't, and I would rather end a relationship as soon as it goes downhill than prolong the horrid thing for 4 months like last time.
Stacey has a bad habit of making fun of me when her friends are around, but being really sweet when we're alone. Tonight we were at the LGBT meeting and she was teasing me relentlessly to the point where the whole group felt uncomfortable. Finally, she made one last comment that really pissed me off, so I didn't say a word, I just got up and left. She ran after me yelling that she was sorry but I didn't bother looking back, I just went home and listened to music. I didn't even really feel any emotion. It was just a process.
So she called me five minutes later apologizing out the ass and I told her "Listen, i'm not going to be your bitch, so don't treat me like that because I know you're sweet when no one else is around, so act like it" and then she was like "Well maybe you're just really sensitive" and I said "Or, um, it could be the fact that you're just an ass" and she kept apologizing, so I forgave her. Then I said I would like to hang out with her more, since we don't see each other very often when we're alone, we're always surrounded by 50,000 of her friends that point and giggle when we flirt with each other. What is this, 5th grade?
I guess tonight I realized how immature she is. I know she has a lot of growing up to do; after all, she's just an 18 year old freshman. I don't really think our dating could develop into anything serious even if we tried really hard. Oh well, Alyson thought the same thing about Celeste when she first met her. I guess i'll just have fun with whatever it is we have, even if she doesn't seem to be doing much to maintain it. I think if she stays with her lack of effort it won't last long. I'm glad I drew the no sex until we're committed boundary because I think this time I won't get attatched.
Everything will be easier this way. Sadly, i'm beginning to realize all women are becoming a blur; they all seem to have the same weird commitment phobias or psychotic episodes and I guess i'm too lazy to be anybody's hero anymore. They're becoming a process, and it hurts to know that i'm losing my childlike enthusiasm about it all. I think the apathy is good for me though, i'll get less attatched and less upset about being alone.
The truth is, it's been a very long time since i've even found a girl that i've been able to talk about poetry with.