I forgot to mention that there are three women living in my body. lol oh no wait, that makes me sound like I have multiple personalities...but there are just three drastic types of women I am, so i'll have to explain them to you:
Woman #1: Soulful, intelligent, shy. Would rather be an observer than step out of her shell. Petrarchan and hopeful. Quiet and soft. Usually this way in front of new people. An orphaned poet child.
Woman#2: Brash, loudmouthed, tough. Fights at the drop of a hat with people who are offensive. Very hot-blooded and physical, laughs, always. Is the first to initiate action, to stir up morale in the ranks. Sexy and confident. An exhibitionist. Usually comes out when I dance in the cage, write, or am around specific friends who know me very well. A stylized, punky warrior and fool.
Woman#3: Never says anything at all. Is cloaked in black and horror. Is filled with rage and vengeance, wants to destroy the world that sealed her away. Obiliterates all opposition and blurs the line between good and evil, drawing it at any who oppose her as being evil. Will mercilessly hurt even a minor offender to the point of making them cry and not feeling anything. Usually comes out very rarely when I am pushed to the edge and feel there is nothing left to live for. Is a horrible witch, a demon who has no soul.
I know who I am, and it is contained within these three women. The trick is figuring out how and when to combine the good attributes of the three. Woman#3 is the most powerful, but uses that annihilation only for darkness. Woman#2 is the one everybody likes, but the one that only comes out with familiar people or the arts used as a medium for her voice. Woman#1 is the one lots of people know and mistake me for...so timid she never gets anything done.
I should combine the best parts of these three and solidify them as one, but don't know how to do that.
Do any of you feel fragmented like this? Who are your three beings, what do you feel you should combine from them?
Woman #1: Soulful, intelligent, shy. Would rather be an observer than step out of her shell. Petrarchan and hopeful. Quiet and soft. Usually this way in front of new people. An orphaned poet child.
Woman#2: Brash, loudmouthed, tough. Fights at the drop of a hat with people who are offensive. Very hot-blooded and physical, laughs, always. Is the first to initiate action, to stir up morale in the ranks. Sexy and confident. An exhibitionist. Usually comes out when I dance in the cage, write, or am around specific friends who know me very well. A stylized, punky warrior and fool.
Woman#3: Never says anything at all. Is cloaked in black and horror. Is filled with rage and vengeance, wants to destroy the world that sealed her away. Obiliterates all opposition and blurs the line between good and evil, drawing it at any who oppose her as being evil. Will mercilessly hurt even a minor offender to the point of making them cry and not feeling anything. Usually comes out very rarely when I am pushed to the edge and feel there is nothing left to live for. Is a horrible witch, a demon who has no soul.
I know who I am, and it is contained within these three women. The trick is figuring out how and when to combine the good attributes of the three. Woman#3 is the most powerful, but uses that annihilation only for darkness. Woman#2 is the one everybody likes, but the one that only comes out with familiar people or the arts used as a medium for her voice. Woman#1 is the one lots of people know and mistake me for...so timid she never gets anything done.
I should combine the best parts of these three and solidify them as one, but don't know how to do that.
Do any of you feel fragmented like this? Who are your three beings, what do you feel you should combine from them?
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Docile Me wants to stay home, does not liek going out, is too tired to go out, wants to do all the things he's wanted to do for himself, like write a book, learn some foreign languages, take a few trips, etc... But he also wants a woman to love him, that he can share his personal secret Me life with, even though he never goes out and thus can't meet people, except on his computer, and even then he doesn't ever really 'meet' anybody, because he never sees them in person. Prefers soy milk and does not like to listen to depressing music as it makes him somber and depressed.
Maniacal Me is a bad motherf*cker whom you do NOT f*ck with under any circumstances unless you want your neck bent back, unless you want to walk away with your teeth in your hands, unless you want your nose so far back in your skull you can smell the aromas in your spinal column. Most people cannot look Maniac in teh eye because the incredulous, angry stare in his eyes is so intense that skinheads piss their pants. Everything and everybody and everything you say and everything you do pisses him off to no end and is grounds for you getting whacked if you cross him again. Likes the taste of blood.
Smartass Me will sit back with a smirk and drop one liners all damn day. He'll say nothing for half an hour and listen to you talk, but the second you say something that sparks a witty comeback, there it is and HAHAHAHAHAAA!!!! Likes to drink coffee and watch wrestling, just so he can make fun of the wrestlers. Don't watch a movie or a TV show with him unless you're doing so to rag on the movie, because he will make so many cracks about said movie or show that you will not be able to relax and enjoy it. Gets sleepy when bored. Likes Red Bull.
There are others, like Working Me who is focused, and Raving Genius Me who acts like a lunatic while writing, but these are the major stages of me. To be frank and generalized, I'd combine the loving spirit of Docile Me with the wit of Smartass Me and the unbreakable sprit of Maniacal Me to form MechaSilentType. I'd meet MechaSilentType and probably be annihilated by his ever-loving superiority. Or maybe he'd just take me for coffee, that'd probably be best.