Login
Forgot Password?

OR

Login with Google Login with Twitter Login with Facebook
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • SuicideGirls
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
Vital Stats Tip

bindi

Down on the Farm, Midwest

SG Since 2007

Followers 5338 Following 1240

  • Everything
  • Photos
  • Video
  • Blogs
  • Groups
  • From Others

I can be funny sometimes :P

Feb 23, 2015
176
  • Facebook
  • Tweet
  • Email

Humor, laughing, light heartedness... I NEED this in my life! Life can be so demanding, so overwhelming, so constricting; I need to laugh! So this week's @bloghomework given by @missy and @rambo is sure to be the highlight of my week!!

**The teacher asked Jimmy, "Why did you bring your cat at school today Jimmy?" Jimmy replied crying, "Because I heard my daddy tell my mommy, 'I am going to eat that pussy once Jimmy leaves for school today!'"

**A family is at the dinner table. The son asks the father, “Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?” The father, surprised, answers, “Well, son, a woman goes through three phases. In her 20s, a woman’s breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her 30s and 40s, they are like pears, still nice, hanging a bit. After 50, they are like onions.” “Onions?” the son asks. “Yes. You see them and they make you cry.”

This infuriated his wife and daughter. The daughter asks, “Mom, how many different kinds of penises are there?” The mother smiles and says, “Well, dear, a man goes through three phases also. In his 20s, his penis is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his 30s and 40s, it’s like a birch, flexible but reliable. After his 50s, it’s like a Christmas tree.” “A Christmas tree?” the daughter asks. “Yes, dead from the root up and the balls are just for decoration.”

**What did one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob? "We better get some support before someone thinks we're nuts!"

**“A little boy caught his mom and dad having sex. After, he asked, "What were you and daddy doing?" The mom said, "We were baking a cake." A few days later, the little boy asked his mom, "Were you and daddy baking a cake in the living room?" She said yes, and asked him how he knew. He answered, "Because I licked the frosting off the couch! It was sweet!”

**What's the ultimate rejection? When you're masturbating and your hand falls asleep.

**What do you do if you come across a tiger in the jungle? Wipe it off and apologize!

**One day there were two boys playing by a stream. One of the young boys was lingering over by a bush. The other boy couldn't figure out why his friend was at the bush so long, so he walked over to the bush, and to his astonishment saw a woman bathing naked in the stream. All of a sudden the second boy took off running.

The first boy couldn't understand why his friend ran away so abruptly, so he took off after him. When he finally caught up to him, he asked why he ran away. The boy said to his friend, "My mom told me if I ever saw a naked lady I would turn to stone, and I felt something getting hard, so I ran."

Hope you enjoyed my dirty jokes!! Now tell me one of your favorites!

<3 Bindi <3

VIEW 25 of 31 COMMENTS
rudeboy71:
Thank you, I had my buddy at work laughing reading some of these out to him. 
Feb 28, 2015
ajsul:
This is just what I needed!! Thank you @bindi and friends!!
Mar 19, 2015

More Blogs

  • 01.18.15
    14

    Making Movies!!!

    Spent all day today on set, filming for The Stray! Apparently th…
  • 01.16.15
    7

    Business Ventures

    @bloghomework One thing you may or may not know about me, I have …
  • 01.15.15
    12

    Images and Videos!

    Hey guys and gals! So, I was thinking... I'd really love to make s…
  • 01.05.15
    8

    Estate Sale finds!

    Score! I love estate/yard/junk sales! Now to find free time to do…
  • 01.02.15
    9

    SG Northeast

    So we're making travel plans for the year and I went to find an SG…
  • 12.23.14
    7

    Nudes and other such stuff

    Wow, what a crazy busy week @the_mortal and I had!! Another pho…
  • 12.10.14
    5

    Nature Nudes for the Homeless

    We're raising funds and awareness for the homeless. 3.5 million Ame…
  • 12.09.14
    6

    Holy HOTT Hopefuls!!! Man, oh man...

  • 12.08.14
    1

    Upcoming shoots and other news!

    ** @The_Mortal and I have a few more shoots before the end of the y…
  • 12.03.14
    8

    Guess What??!!

    I'm going to be in a movie!! I played a very small part in a ho…

We at SuicideGirls have been celebrating alternative pin-up girls for:

23
years
8
months
22
days
  • 5,509,826 fans
  • 41,393 fans
  • 10,327,617 followers
  • 4,589 SuicideGirls
  • 1,122,986 followers
  • 14,909,968 photos
  • 321,315 followers
  • 61,366,512 comments
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
  • Help
  • About
  • Press
  • LIVE

Legal/Tos | DMCA | Privacy Policy | 18 U.S.C. 2257 Record-Keeping Requirements Compliance Statement | Contact Us | Vendo Payment Support
©SuicideGirls 2001-2025

Press enter to search
Fast Hi-res

Click here to join & see it all...

Crop your photo