The misadventures of BigPoppa99
So on a lark I decide to give speed dating a try. I was on this list and they do these speed dating events. I get a text from them and they tell me that they have more women than men at the next Speed dating event. If I was interested it would be free. So I decide to do it. Meet 12 women open bar and hors douveres for free Im in.
So I get to the place, Its some lounge down town. So I decide to try and have some fun with it.
Now with speed dating you get about 7 minutes to interace with your date. You fill out cards and if you both are a match the coordinators send you the contact information.
So I have 7 minutes to impress or horrify my date.
I decide to have fun and try to be a different person for each date. I try to keep my general information the same, just deviate a little. Name, job, hobbies will try to remain constant. Personality, likes and dislikes may change.
So the first date went something like this
Poppa: Hi, how are you doing I'm Poppa
Date 1: I'm fine I'm Really hot and you have no chance in hell to get with me.
Poppa: Its a pleasure to meet you. So have you seen and good movies lately
Date 1: Yes I have I saw Juno and I really loved it. Michale Cerra is really cute in that.
Poppa: Oh I havent seen it I liked him in Superbad
Date 1: Oh so your into the mindles comedys
Poppa: Yes I like em and, I like my sci-fi, crime dramas , adventure movies and porn
Date 1: blinks
Poppa: I'm actully looking forward to Iron Man and Prince Caspian
Date 1: Did you say porn?
Poppa: um yeah I did. It made almost 2 blllion dollars last year there has to be other people watching it.
Date 1: oh my god
Poppa: Takes a big sip of beer and leaning back in the chair
Date 1: Oh my god. I like porn to. Finally a man who will admit to watching it and not being afraid to say so.
Poppa: blank stare
Date 1: So let me guess your into girl, girl right? I like your regular girl guy stuff but Im also into hardcore gay and transgendered porn
Poppa: Blinks, blank stare, coughing on my beer.
Poppa: Um I like the Evil Angel line, and Bangbros on the web.
Date 1: Bangbros are awsome. If i did porn I would shoot with them because they are in Miami
Poppa: Thats cool um I would look for it.
Date 1: giggle oh ok.
Poppa: Do you have a porn name picked out?
Date 1: I actually tried the pet name and street where you lived but it was real stupid. It would of been Cookie 13.
Poppa: Yeah your right it is.
Date 1: ok smart ass what is your porn star name.
Poppa 1: Hung Lo
Date 1: snort. Oh my god thats hilarious
BELL rings in the back ground
Poppa it was a pleasure to meet you
Date 1: Yes it was. Oh dont forget your drink
Poppa: thanks
Now I wanted to try and shock miss yeah Im hot and you think you got a shot with me your wrong. It obvisously backfired. The moment of silence is me trying to back peddle and try to continue the conversation about porn. She was obvisously taking over my thread and in turn suprised me.
Edit: I need to add that she was really into transgendered porn teling me it was the best of both worlds. My jaw almost fell out of head. She was really into that genre. She was very descriptive of that type of porn.
So on a lark I decide to give speed dating a try. I was on this list and they do these speed dating events. I get a text from them and they tell me that they have more women than men at the next Speed dating event. If I was interested it would be free. So I decide to do it. Meet 12 women open bar and hors douveres for free Im in.
So I get to the place, Its some lounge down town. So I decide to try and have some fun with it.
Now with speed dating you get about 7 minutes to interace with your date. You fill out cards and if you both are a match the coordinators send you the contact information.
So I have 7 minutes to impress or horrify my date.
I decide to have fun and try to be a different person for each date. I try to keep my general information the same, just deviate a little. Name, job, hobbies will try to remain constant. Personality, likes and dislikes may change.
So the first date went something like this
Poppa: Hi, how are you doing I'm Poppa
Date 1: I'm fine I'm Really hot and you have no chance in hell to get with me.
Poppa: Its a pleasure to meet you. So have you seen and good movies lately
Date 1: Yes I have I saw Juno and I really loved it. Michale Cerra is really cute in that.
Poppa: Oh I havent seen it I liked him in Superbad
Date 1: Oh so your into the mindles comedys
Poppa: Yes I like em and, I like my sci-fi, crime dramas , adventure movies and porn
Date 1: blinks
Poppa: I'm actully looking forward to Iron Man and Prince Caspian
Date 1: Did you say porn?
Poppa: um yeah I did. It made almost 2 blllion dollars last year there has to be other people watching it.
Date 1: oh my god
Poppa: Takes a big sip of beer and leaning back in the chair
Date 1: Oh my god. I like porn to. Finally a man who will admit to watching it and not being afraid to say so.
Poppa: blank stare
Date 1: So let me guess your into girl, girl right? I like your regular girl guy stuff but Im also into hardcore gay and transgendered porn
Poppa: Blinks, blank stare, coughing on my beer.
Poppa: Um I like the Evil Angel line, and Bangbros on the web.
Date 1: Bangbros are awsome. If i did porn I would shoot with them because they are in Miami
Poppa: Thats cool um I would look for it.
Date 1: giggle oh ok.
Poppa: Do you have a porn name picked out?
Date 1: I actually tried the pet name and street where you lived but it was real stupid. It would of been Cookie 13.
Poppa: Yeah your right it is.
Date 1: ok smart ass what is your porn star name.
Poppa 1: Hung Lo
Date 1: snort. Oh my god thats hilarious
BELL rings in the back ground
Poppa it was a pleasure to meet you
Date 1: Yes it was. Oh dont forget your drink
Poppa: thanks
Now I wanted to try and shock miss yeah Im hot and you think you got a shot with me your wrong. It obvisously backfired. The moment of silence is me trying to back peddle and try to continue the conversation about porn. She was obvisously taking over my thread and in turn suprised me.
Edit: I need to add that she was really into transgendered porn teling me it was the best of both worlds. My jaw almost fell out of head. She was really into that genre. She was very descriptive of that type of porn.
VIEW 17 of 17 COMMENTS
50 and cloudy is way to cold for my taste bro!!! Yikes.