I just wanted to take the time to thank everyone who has sent me their kind words and thoughts. I have hit rock bottom and the only place to go now is up. I guess it takes realizing you are at the bottom of the bucket before you can see your way out. I am slowly climbing out of my emotional termoil and taking one day at a time. I love you all...thanks a bunch 
that's all you can do sometimes is persevere.............!