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bettybruises

Member Since 2008

Followers 183 Following 183

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Sunday Dec 20, 2009

Dec 20, 2009
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So yesterday morning I started my drive to Colorado for Christmas at 10 am and stopped a few times, got here in 12 1/2 hours, man I love having a speedy little jetta with a turbo wink
It was so wonderful to let Zeus get out and romp around in the snow, there's not really anywhere in Southern California that I can just let him run off leash, he's so happy here.
It's freezing cold, but I am kinda enjoying it, it feels like winter. No matter how much Colorado kinda drives me crazy when living here, every time I come back I feel that wonderful feeling of being home. Even though I have the mountains, the red earth and the trees memorized, it always takes my breath away to see it. It's such a weird thing to me knowing that I love where I come from, but I can't live here for long. Still, I love coming back, some of my dearest friends on this planet are here and it warms my heart to see them and my family and the mountains.
When I was 18 I bought a little leather indian pouch at this new age store, I started keeping small stones and shells and what not in it from places that have become close to my heart in all my travels. The first stone came from my favorite hiking trail outside of my hometown. It is my way of carrying all the places I have lived and/or visited that have meaning to me...
I wish I had a way to carry all of the people with me as well...
This past year has been a tough one on me.
I moved to California, had problems with my first house (it was full of toxic black mold) had trouble meeting people, lost my job, was unemployed for several months, sprained my ankle twice, which resulted in a surgery and me being unable to do hardly anything physical for about 8 months, gained weight as a result, am losing that weight, but it took a toll on my self esteem, had a tumultuous relationship that also took a toll on my self esteem, it's over now and we're friends, i'm now on job 3 since i've moved. My cousin who is like a sister to me almost died of alcoholism (pancreatitus) in july, she came out of her coma when I was visiting her in the hospital in july and thought she was dying because I was there (she had no idea how close she actually was to that being a reality, I came because I thought it might be the last time I saw her).
However, right now my heart is happy because
I have a job
I have a small but wonderful handful of friends in Southern California that I have met through SG, and they are a wonderfully colorful group of unique people smile
My family is healthy, my cousin has one or two more operations but she is healing.
Lastly, I have travelled more than most people ever get to, I have some amazing friends spread out from southern california to hong kong.
I need to remind myself that even though my job is a step back professionally, I am making 40% less than I was a year ago, and am broke and want to move out of Southern California.

Regardless my life is good, better than many...

So that's the end of my mushy blog.
I have a happy heart today!
***oh yeah and I can use my parents computer while home visiting, so I can sneak into chat again wink hahaha****
VIEW 10 of 10 COMMENTS
punknitemike:
sounds like your life has taken a turn for the better, good for you! smile
Dec 21, 2009
rattpunk:
Have a great time in colorado with your family... happy holidays smile
Dec 22, 2009

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