beroccaboy

I think frustrating myself that way would be a cruel, masochistic punishment.

i agree ... i drag myself into my own unhappiness.

at the moment though i need the distractions, they are better than the alternative. i feel disconnected, i never really fit in those chat things, everyone seems to know each other, it's clicky, the girls are hot and now the closest i get are when i sing "glory days", but ... the loneliness ... the time alone in my head ... without the distraction, is not good

i am no different to other people ... we all know what it means to be sad, just like we all know what it means to be happy ... just like going to they gym ... i force myself to jump online ... i put my thick skin on and just jump in. sure no one says hi ... sure i don't have anything clever to say, i get scared, who wouldn't ... nevertheless, i just jump in and say hi

every now and then, sooner than i could have even hoped for ... someone like you comes along and even if it is for a day or a week ... i am a little bit more connected. i just keep going ... sooner or later it is all fixed ...

i am not the nicest person .. nor am i the worst ... i appreciate the chat :-)

thanks mate :-)