benni

update and edit your journal.

its been a long time since ive seen that.

yes indeedy. a long... dang... time.

ive been gaining weight. my butt, my belly, my boobs. just gaining gaining gaining. it doesnt stop. fattening up doesnt agree with me. im all tense and bitter.

yep. time to hit me the gym. im putting out an application for my own personal personal trainer. anyone? anyone lurking out there who would derive pleasure from making me sweat and stink like a stinky sweaty pig? anyone? theres fun in that, i promise.

i fucking promise.

you know, thousands of youngsters long to express themselves through the art of music.

*gasp* "esteban..."

esteban.

you know what i need? a life transplant. i need a new life. preferably one that isnt crumbling beneath my feet. its hard to plan your next move when there ISNT anywhere more to move.

but i guess no one can help that but me. oh, the irony.

silence in my head. im trying to shut myself up.

my life...

my worthless life.

you know, the worst part of reading that over is knowing the people in my life would read that and attribute that to failure on their parts... nope. nope. all me.

hehe. bet you guys are sorry i stopped to check in NOW.

i hope everyone is holding up. the holidays tend to be a time of stress and angst for a lot of people-- myself included-- and youve got to remember just to take a few minutes out of your day, take a deep breath, and be cool.

just be cool.

"Esteban!"

yes, timmy. Esteban.

esteban.

i love you folks. with all of my body. including my pee-pee.