OH MY.
So I have just walked in the door. After nearly killing myself on the slick thin fucking cold ice on the steps and walkway (salt won't work to clean the ice at this temp.), i am now inside, and about to light into a bowl of excitement.
This is born from meeting and reacting to the most wonderful fucking girl. I was totally intimidated by this person, as she is damn confident, and one of those Alpha people. Domineering persona with a huge strong job. Beautiful. Beautiful. Fantastic eyes that are so clear and insightful. And a powerful girl. A dragon boat racer and martial artist. Fucking yumm. This might be one of those untouchable friends.. But to be around that energy can only be beneficial. And her heart.. mmmm. She is a sensitive and compassionate girl too! Double fucking yumm.
Sigh. Whatever. That is about it. Done for dates. I realize that this is a problem for me. I am not a womanizer.. but I do seek an unhealthy satisfaction from girls and their attractions. I am going to fall into the friendzone with everyone until something just happens or I get the signal from a particular someone whom I can see myself with.
Whatever. I tell myself that now. We'll see. Do I practice what I preach to myself? Lately yes. Lately yes. I am such a fucktard though (no offense to the other fucktards). Yet I can see myself getting better. More healthy. My mental fucking environment. I have done all of the right things in the last little bit; the last couple of years. I have learned.
FUCK
So I have just walked in the door. After nearly killing myself on the slick thin fucking cold ice on the steps and walkway (salt won't work to clean the ice at this temp.), i am now inside, and about to light into a bowl of excitement.
This is born from meeting and reacting to the most wonderful fucking girl. I was totally intimidated by this person, as she is damn confident, and one of those Alpha people. Domineering persona with a huge strong job. Beautiful. Beautiful. Fantastic eyes that are so clear and insightful. And a powerful girl. A dragon boat racer and martial artist. Fucking yumm. This might be one of those untouchable friends.. But to be around that energy can only be beneficial. And her heart.. mmmm. She is a sensitive and compassionate girl too! Double fucking yumm.
Sigh. Whatever. That is about it. Done for dates. I realize that this is a problem for me. I am not a womanizer.. but I do seek an unhealthy satisfaction from girls and their attractions. I am going to fall into the friendzone with everyone until something just happens or I get the signal from a particular someone whom I can see myself with.
Whatever. I tell myself that now. We'll see. Do I practice what I preach to myself? Lately yes. Lately yes. I am such a fucktard though (no offense to the other fucktards). Yet I can see myself getting better. More healthy. My mental fucking environment. I have done all of the right things in the last little bit; the last couple of years. I have learned.

FUCK