bekka138

I seem to just have that lost feeling for the last couple of days, the feeling that everything is floating around you and that nothing you do matters to anyone. I seem to be ok on most days, and then there are other days when I feel like the whole world is crashing around me, and there is no permanence to anything.

I am taking a leace of abscence from school for the semester and will be starting again in Janurary. I just cant seem to cope with everything that is going on, school, and work, and well, ive called into work 8 times in the last month, and havent really been going to class anyways, so it seems to be the best idea.

Im sick of everyone telling me what I should do with my future. Does anybody realize that I had that all figured out unitl my world crumbled back in April. I have a hard enough time getting thru the week, and im supposed to figure out everything else too, why just to make everyone else happy? I have spent my whole fucking life trying to make others happy, and where has it gotten me?

Im tired of the people that care about me, and that is so selfish, but I just am sick to death of peoples "concern". If I want to be crazy and selfish for a while, I think I have earned it.

Wow, that turned out pretty bitter and depressing.