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beatnik

milwaukee, wi

Member Since 2003

Followers 46 Following 51

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Saturday Jun 18, 2005

Jun 18, 2005
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Got bored so i got all dressed up in my finest threads and shot some photos this evening, and despite my mild dysmorphic tendencies, I'm actually pretty pleased with the ways these piece of shit photos turned out.

I've got this thing..... like this absurd, bullshit issue. I've never felt more unattractive in my life. And despite what people say, people need to feel that way sometimes - attractive, that is. I guess I've never told anyone that, but i may as well while I'm posting this. I mean, I know it's pretty childish and doesn't really matter THAT much, but sometimes I wish i could know that someone thinks about me on their own time...... i guess that's the greatest gift anyone could give you: their time.

I just feel completely useless. I want to feel important. I want to feel deserving. And I don't.... I haven't for a long, long time.

Is it wrong of me to want that?

It certainly doesnt help that I don't have a job, either. Fuck.

--

I've been dealing with my friend's suicide pretty well. Everything is starting to make a strange kind of sense. I've just spent a lot of time thinking, and its amazing what you can discover about almost anything when you have no other option but to evaluate life as a whole. I hope that makes sense. Probobly not. I'm still working things out.

To you SG Milwaukee folks, Thursday was great. Lets do it again.... soon.... because I have no life....

beatnik
surreal

VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
dingoes8:
Very dramatic picture. I couldn't pull that off.

I have no job or life, either. It's pretty lame. Everyone around here seems to want to hang out, we just need someone to organize it. Way to step up. Keep doing it and I'll keep showing up. wink
Jun 20, 2005
wardy:
coffee one of these days--i swear!
Jun 30, 2005

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