bean

So much sadness. I'm a sucker for sadness. I'm a hopeless helper. I'm a cuddler, a hugger, a cry-on-my-shoulder-er, a sounding board, a giant ear, an idea-bouncing-wall, a confessional. I feel endlessly compelled to comfort the unhappy, especially since I was sooooo perpetually unhappy for nearly a decade. I actually wrote a poem about the dark side of this compulsion to help, and maybe I'll post it somewhere at some point, but probably not.

I see people around me feeling sad, and all I want to do is help. Even if there's nothing I can do to improve the situation, I just want to comfort them. Sometimes, because of distance (either figurative or literal) or obstacles (real or imaginary), I can't comfort them, and it makes me uncomfortable...I get muscle cramps. My stomach feels rotten. Sometimes people say they don't want to be comforted, and then they'll spend the next several hours talking to me about their problems. I just listen.

And if I hear one more person call someone a "stupid emo" for having feelings, I swear to god I'm going to jump through the computer and crack their fucking skull. Aargh!! Humans have emotions. If you don't like seeing them, shut the fuck up and go back into your cave you troglodyte prick. Grr.

But people on here aren't like that, right?
I love you all.