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bcoskin

Oklahoma City

Member Since 2004

Followers 12 Following 11

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Friday Jul 02, 2004

Jul 2, 2004
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Well I am updating just for the sake of updating. There's really nothing TO update, but I hate staring at the same journal entry every time I log onto SG.

I haven't talked to Robin since she booked the flight Wednesday afternoon. She tried to call me that night while I was at a movie, and when I tried to call her back afterward I got no answer. I tried calling again tonight with the same results. She'll call me sometime during the weekend I'm sure, but it's a real sick feeling... not being able to get your best friend on the phone in over 2 days.

I don't remember if I ever told you all the details of this, but the other day I asked her what keeps her so busy. She said she spends all her time working and driving. Well... she works at a coffee place and never has to stay past 1 in the afternoon. When I asked where she drove, she said San Jose - where paul lives (I refuse to capitalize that name) and if she doesn't answer her phone 2 nights in a row, she must be over at his house quite a bit. I feel like I'm going to be sick. I haven't been this fucked up over her since 2 summers ago when she was dating her first of 2 alex's.

Before paul, and both alex's... it was justin... and there has been ryan since day one. Sure I've had girlfriends since we've known each other. 2 serious ones... but they never seem to have effected her like her boyfriends effect me. What the fuck am I going to do? Just hearing that "Hi you've reached Robin's cell phone..." is enough to make me stay up all night worrying and feeling sick and depressed. She's coming in a month and all I'm thinking about is how much I want to kill that bastard paul.

Me and Her are both skinheads. We did it together in a way. She did it six months after, but the principle was there. Not an "If you do I will too" thing. But something we wanted to share together. She just had prior commitments before she took the plunge, and nobody will blame her for that. It's her and me. It's been her and me for years, best friends and more than that for years! Where the fuck does paul fit into that equation? Why can't shit go my way ONE MOTHERFUCKING TIME.

Effexor, sleeping pill, and a slice of pizza.

I'll see you in the morning.
lucky7:
Maybe you should tell her you worry about her when you don't hear from her for days. I'm sure she'd respect that.
Also, does she even know you feel this way? I had a best friend growing up & I moved out of state & got married & he had a girlfriend while I was married...I then got divorced & he hinted that he wanted me to come back. It was always a bit strange. I've always loved him. We never had that talk & I decided to stop keeping in touch with him after his girlfriend found my # & called me to ask me what had gone on between us! I was wierded out by that. surreal
Good luck, I'm sure you'll have a great time when she visits!
Jul 5, 2004
jayde__:
I have to echo Lucky7's sentiment: Let her know how worried you've been. Don't assume she knows, because most of the time, the other person doesn't. And I know that I, personally, care when a friend (especially ones who aren't just internet friends) actually lets me know they've been worrying about me. Anyway, just my two cents.

I hope everything works out for you.
Jul 5, 2004

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