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bayley

Hopeful Since 2014

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Blog homework: what are you thankful for?

Nov 25, 2015
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I'm enjoying everyone's blogs about what they are thankful for this year. It's actually turning out to be a good way to get to know something new about people in this community. I'm not sure mine will be as entertaining though. It'll probably just be incoherent ramblings by Bayley, haha.

This year has been an emotional roller-coaster. It's certainly had some happy wonderful moments, and also its difficult and very yucky moments. I guess I can be thankful that I survived it. Some drama happened over the summer. I became very depressed and consumed with these thoughts. Literally to a point that I thought I wasn't going to survive myself.

I started trying to find myself. First, I looked in the Twitch community, where I met some really awesome and wonderful people. However, I still felt like I was hiding me. Next, I tried on tumblr, but I think I'm just too boring, haha. Lastly, I came back to SuicideGirls after a year away. I'm learning how to be me here. Getting naked in front of a camera, for me, is so much more then just getting attention, or showing off what I have, it's in valuing what I have, it's allowing myself to find other people who not only appreciate that but can also say, hey I'm going to value what I have as well. The vulnerability of a plus size girl being here.... that's me, I'm trying to be all in, whether people like it or accept it or not. I'm freeing myself. I totally understand that I'm rambling. I'm thankful that I can ramble, and someone will actually read this and get it, and some may read this and think I'm crazy, but that's ok, thank YOU so much for reading.

So to try my best to sum up my rambling. This year I'm thankful for surviving struggles, being brave enough to be vulnerable, and I'm thankful to be here and to be able to find like minded people and be able to make new friends.

@missy and @rambo

VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
mitchymitch93:
im thankful you're here to and don't worry about the ramblings I do it a lot to when I write blogs as well as I'm sure you've noticed when you've popped over to my page to read mine :) 
Nov 26, 2015
vanissa:
Such a good blog post! I enjoyed reading it even if you considered it to be you rambling. :) I'm so thankful that you are here and that we are friends! You are such a beautiful and inspiring lady! <3 :)
Nov 27, 2015

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