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bashster

United Kingdom

Member Since 2004

Followers 35 Following 72

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Tuesday Sep 27, 2005

Sep 27, 2005
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Just got time to write this while trying to fend off a badgering coca cola obsessed dog and a boiling pit of anger welling in my gut from having a crapola day at work.
Talking of work we had a hearse in for repair so the following =mucho amusement in the work.
1.How to make a coffin to go in said vehicle,simple use bumper box 6foot by 2 plenty big enough.
2.Get somebody to lay in box in back of hearse and pretend to be dead,simple use errr ME!.
3How to scare the fuck outta a parts delivery lady,easy apply flour bought from shop to head lay in box make funny groaning noise when she approachs flip lid up get up realslow and zombie like(which i,m good at)and scare the living shit outta her!.
Talking of parts women after reading rucks journal about gay boyfriend lust(ps rucks he would only be able to give you it up the arse winki had parts lady lust.The girl in question looks a bit like a young gloria estafan crossed with penelepe cruz with selma hayek(the girl in dusk till dawn who nearly made me cream my jeans when i saw it at the flicks),delivered a bumper when i was eating my tuna salad(dolphinsafe)sandwich.She said give us a bite which i obliged then has in slow motion the maya squirted outta the corner of her mouth and dribbled down her chin,she smiled and again in slow motion wiped it whilst i gazed into her eyes of beauty,and all i could think of was a straight swap for my dribbling no i won,t go there.Lust is a bad think i suppose but i would lay under a glass table no that jokes to sick!.
Talking of jokes what the fuck happened in that traffic jam in the state the hurricane hit.Before you set off check tyres,water but don,t fill the car up take extra fuel then break down like a fuckwit!.Americans drive big gas guzzling beasts thats why they all ran out of fuel but then theres plenty leaking underground if you,ve got a shovel.
If you get time check out the following
Viking skull- bona fide bam approved rock band retro as fuck!.
Duece bigalow euro gigalo fucking funny as fuck
Trl uk mtv.
Dirty sanchez series three with amazing beer enema and scrotam shredding guitar string wanging!
Bon jovis new album(wot a said man i am!)
The gorillaz website which is awesome
Franz ferdinand new single a poor mans pulp grrrr! mad .
Seether a new Nirvana?

ps stay away from the basement to my irish girlie thats where you sound to be heading.Get to the garage it rocks!

Must dash its tea time i think i will have pasta al forno then it will be masta al porno me thinks
see you later aligators Bash
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
hivernal:
Me thanks for the welcome, and it's cool that you're English. Anyone with enough intelligence not to pigeonhole others according to their language, color or heritage gets off on a good foot with me.

I'm only quasi-evil, when I met my significant other Sara about 6 years ago the evil got watered down and it's been rough having to deal with these "feelings" all of a sudden. I'm still in the midst of building my secret underground lair in the middle of an active volcano though.

Yeah the consumerist way of life just wasn't bringing in the happiness like the t.v box said it would. I've since found the joys of Eastern thought, and the way their art portrays life, hope, and the shortcomings of being a mere mortal. I have, since then, discovered the secret to eternal youth (it has something to do with monkeys and little toy trains)

I think I'll have stew and homemade bread now.

Cheers & welcome to my list. ooo aaa

Dr.E (me likes)

Edited because I'm tired...

[Edited on Sep 28, 2005 1:19AM]
Sep 27, 2005
fireyspright:
Hahahaha, thats sooo funny. I bet that lady nearly died when she saw uncle bash at his most gruesome zombieist!!!! love I didn't really understand most of the rest, except the part about the oil...thats not underground, its floating in most of the pristine waters of the northwest...mostly near alska...lucky little eskimos will be able to run their waverunners for years after we all turn into mutant zombies.. skull
Anyways, catch ya later kiss
Sep 28, 2005

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